An hero: The adventure thread

iconsting · Post by **iconsting** » Mon Sep 13, 2010 1:59 am

>Freak out.

Alexandy13 · Post by **Alexandy13** » Mon Sep 13, 2010 2:05 am

iconsting wrote:>Freak out.

Roll for sanity check.

Critical Failure.

betrippin · Post by **betrippin** » Mon Sep 13, 2010 2:42 am

iconsting wrote:>Freak out.

Alexandy13 wrote:
Roll for sanity check.

Critical Failure.

You start FREAKING the FUCK out like the madman you are.

"FERGLAJKHGNMOLPH"

You screech

Fotsteps are heard coming up the stairs along with people chattering.

Your mom comes into the room.

She is in her late 40s she has red hair and a slight irish accent. Her breast are slightly limping but a good height for her age. The are deep bags under her eyes from lack of sleep.

"Are you okay honey?" She asks

"I'm fine mom. Don't worry." You reply back

"Okay well heres something to make sure you dont bump into anything." she says as she tosses you a bright red flashlight

>+1 flashlight

Your mother heads back downstairs leaving the door open. The smell of chuips, dip, and tiny wieners on toothpicks fill your nostrils. You then remember that your parents were having a party for no apparent reason

What do you do?

Darkin · Post by **Darkin** » Mon Sep 13, 2010 2:59 am

>Have incestious intercourse with your mother
failing that...
>Go downstairs naked

Doormaster · Post by **Doormaster** » Mon Sep 13, 2010 3:11 am

>Break aquarium with flashlight
>An hero with shards of glass

Shoolis · Post by **Shoolis** » Mon Sep 13, 2010 3:13 am

Turn flashlight

into Fleshlight.

Alexandy13 · Post by **Alexandy13** » Mon Sep 13, 2010 3:17 am

>STEAL tiny toothpicked SNACKS

Trygve · Post by **Trygve** » Mon Sep 13, 2010 8:04 am

>Get sexy and flex among the ladies.

Odds · Post by **Odds** » Mon Sep 13, 2010 8:04 am

>Why aren't you dead already.

betrippin · Post by **betrippin** » Mon Sep 13, 2010 11:32 pm

Shoolis wrote:Turn flashlight

into Fleshlight.

You eat the flashlight

>-1 FLASHLIGHT
>+1 FLESHLIGHT

Chinmaster wrote:>Break aquarium with flashlight
>An hero with shards of glass

You now wish you had thought of that before you ate the flashlight

Darkin wrote:>Have incestious intercourse with your mother
failing that...
>Go downstairs naked

Your mother already left so you can't have intercourse with her.
Failing that, you go downstairs NAKED the female guests and a few male guest swoon at your huge manlitude.

Alexandy13 wrote:>STEAL tiny toothpicked SNACKS

You start cramming your pie hole with various tiny snacks

Trygve wrote:>Get sexy and flex among the ladies.

You start thinking "What would my sexy hero, Trygve, do?" You start flexing your nakedness for all to see the women start coming on to you. You choose the sexiest of them all and start fornicating in the punch bowl.

>-1 virginity

Oodles wrote:>Why aren't you dead already.

Because you are busy fornicating in the punch bowl. PAY ATTENTION ODDS

John Craft · Post by **John Craft** » Mon Sep 13, 2010 11:40 pm

Well you're finally posting !
We were waiting for you !
And that was worth it.

>re-evaluate this whole "killing oneself" thing now that you found out you could just get any girl through flashing (litterally) your dong

Alexandy13 · Post by **Alexandy13** » Tue Sep 14, 2010 12:22 am

>change class to MANLY MAN GUY

Fatehehhhh · Post by **Fatehehhhh** » Tue Sep 14, 2010 12:39 am

> Attempt to drown yourself in a puddle of fruit punch

betrippin · Post by **betrippin** » Tue Sep 14, 2010 12:57 am

John Craft wrote: >re-evaluate this whole "killing oneself" thing now that you found out you could just get any girl through flashing (litterally) your dong

Fatehehhhh wrote:> Attempt to drown yourself in a puddle of fruit punch

You start thinking about your day so far, whilst trying to drown yourself in the punch bowl, your new naked girlfriend standing nearby.

Lets see:

You decide to kill yourself,
you ate a flashlight
you got naked
you stole all of your mother snacks
and you started humping a very attractive brunette in the punchbowl

This seems like a very full day to you and a well lived life. Maybe you shouldn't kill yourself. But instead, help others to kill themselves. Yeah, thats it. You become the sucidal helper..Or something to that effect. You are still thinking of a cool super hero killer name.

Also, the attractive woman's name was Charlene.

She was wearing a very tight dress that hugged her curves ever so nicely and she was not wearing a bra. Of course now that doesnt matter.

She had lucious blue eyes and a a voice like an enchantress.

>Nickname newly caught girlfriend?

Alexandy13 wrote:>change class to MANLY MAN GUY

You have now switched classes to MANLY MAN GUY which makes charlene even more attracted to you, and you two start having sex again.
The sheer "being in the roomitude" cause all other men and family members to dissapear into mid air.

You are now stuck in a room full of attractive women, it is still raining outside.

What do you do?

electronic goat · Post by **electronic goat** » Tue Sep 14, 2010 3:18 am

betrippin wrote:
You are now stuck in a room full of attractive women, it is still raining outside.

What do you do?

Excuse me, stuck?