Advice Thread

Lotharu · Post by **Lotharu** » Sun Jul 18, 2010 4:45 am

[Citation Needed] wrote: [insert Edward Cullen-style stalking]

Yay, I've always wanted someone to watch me in my sleep!

Explotaro · Post by **Explotaro** » Sun Jul 18, 2010 4:48 am

[Citation Needed] wrote:
Who's Autumn?

My fiancee. We've been together almost three years. A little more than a month ago, before I moved up to Wyoming, I asked her to marry me. She said yes.

If the funds are available, we shall wed next summer when she moves up here. (She still needs to graduate high school) I want to become her husband before she goes to Air Force Basic training.

Robot · Post by **Robot** » Sun Jul 18, 2010 4:49 am

Lotharu wrote:
[Citation Needed] wrote: [insert Edward Cullen-style stalking]
Yay, I've always wanted someone to watch me in my sleep!

Ok.

Tall-Hatted Yanimae · Post by **Tall-Hatted Yanimae** » Sun Jul 18, 2010 5:04 am

Explotaro wrote:(She still needs to graduate high school)

Uh yeah good luck with that.

Marrying straight out of high school and at such a young age might have worked back in like, the 40's.

But maybe you guys should wait until you've experienced life outside of the comfort of your homelife with your parents and of school and see how your relationship handles itself through your jobs and while living on your own or in college.

I don't know if either of you plan on going to college or not, but I personally think it's better to wait until you guys have jobs that you want that bring a substantiate amount of cheddar enough to support the two of you.
And definitely do not think of having children for some time. They cost a fuckload of cheddar to take care of.

[Citation Needed] · Post by **[Citation Needed]** » Sun Jul 18, 2010 5:07 am

Tall-Hatted Yanimae wrote:
Explotaro wrote:(She still needs to graduate high school)
Uh yeah good luck with that.

Marrying straight out of high school and at such a young age might have worked back in like, the 40's.

My Mom and Dad did that.
Mom is 47, Dad is 48.
Sure wasn't the 1940's when they got married.

Explotaro · Post by **Explotaro** » Sun Jul 18, 2010 5:13 am

Tall-Hatted Yanimae wrote:
Explotaro wrote:(She still needs to graduate high school)
I don't know if either of you plan on going to college or not

I'm already in college and graduated high school with a job, well on my way to becoming a Journalist/Photographer.

She'll be a medic in the Air Force then after that she's going to be a childrens nurse

And we also know that we won't have kids right off. It'll be maybe 6-10 years.

Tall-Hatted Yanimae · Post by **Tall-Hatted Yanimae** » Sun Jul 18, 2010 5:20 am

Well I'm saying that it was a prominent thing that happened back then. Mostly because of men being shipped off to war so they're all oh well I'm going to war LET'S GET MARRIED SINCE I MIGHT NOT RETURN.

My point is, Take this slowly. You guys may have dated for some time now and I'm sure you guys are close but you are still just getting your feet grounded into the real world. There will be challenges ahead and I think it's best to learn how your relationship will brace itself for it and how it will take the real world before you guys decide you're ready to take it to the next step.

Edit: Well then I'm just glad you guys have a plan. I've seen many a time teens who are all "Omg we're gon get married cos I luv him forever" and I don't see their relationships last outside of the easy life of a high schooler. Many don't even have jobs or plans for where they're going.

Post by **Vax** » Sun Jul 18, 2010 5:25 am

I whole heartedly agree with Yanimae. Not only do you have the stressor of inadequate funds to deal with, but she's going to be going away for basic training, and you're just getting into college (I assume from what you said)
You have barely begun to mesh with real world, and distance like that can really tear down a relationship, married or otherwise. Sometimes love makes people hasty or nervous, and you think that, aslong as you love eachother, things like that shouldn't matter, but you can't survive on love alone, and neither can a relationship like yours. I strongly suggest you wait. Things can change, after all. They always do.

Tall-Hatted Yanimae · Post by **Tall-Hatted Yanimae** » Sun Jul 18, 2010 5:27 am

You guys could totally have promise rings. I think those are pretty cute.

Post by **Vax** » Sun Jul 18, 2010 5:30 am

Aw das cold mang

Tall-Hatted Yanimae · Post by **Tall-Hatted Yanimae** » Sun Jul 18, 2010 5:31 am

How did I sound cold?

Explotaro · Post by **Explotaro** » Sun Jul 18, 2010 5:33 am

Thanks for the advice. I appriciate it. We've always known to take it slow. On a side note, her and I have never had any arguements (other than the mushy I love you more stuff)

But what I really needed advice on was the whole my inner child might affect the taking care of her.

EDIT: FUCKING WORD FILTERS!

I wanted to give her my class ring (old and cliche, I know.) as an engagement ring, but her mom and my gramma had a fit.

Post by **Vax** » Sun Jul 18, 2010 5:34 am

Oh my bad, I thought you were patronizing him or something. Forgive my assumption.

Post by **Spoony** » Sun Jul 18, 2010 5:35 am

Does she actually need taking care of? Is she that dependant?

Explotaro · Post by **Explotaro** » Sun Jul 18, 2010 5:38 am

You guys beat me before I finsihed the edit:
I wanted to give her my class ring (old and cliche, I know.) as an engagement ring, but her mom and my gramma had a fit.

Also, while she may not need it, I want to take care of her...support her, I should say. Like in a family, obviously

And I now she can hold her own. So....this is my choice to support and protect her anyway I can.