Vampire Adventure

[Decker]

hey decker keep being stupid it's awesome

[Defenestrator2.0]

Def has an odd habit of only knowing how to post images.

I have the odd habit of pointing out that people need to stop being so unoriginal and refrain from recreating the same daisies thread twenty times over.

The only thread I can see on the frontpage that you've made was a Zombiepocalypse thread and that's so original and new

Glass house stone throwing contest, anyone? :v

I made that thread because the Taboo Topics thread kept on getting derailed. It was created out of necessity, not out of desire. Had you actually bothered to look past the first page, you would have seen some of the topics I've created.

A jorb well done
Everything but the kitchen sink
You'll get your just desserts

I'm sorry, you needed a 'shut the fuck up' card? Well there it is, jagoff. They may be niche topics, but at least I'm not copying somebody else's idea. You know why? Because I actually put a bit of thought into my threads.

[Fooflyer]

I don't need to be original to have fun

[Superior Bacon]

def, you're just being a booty now. let them have fun.

[Fooflyer]

After an 'incredibly long' period of time making the decision as to whom exactly shall reign as your eternal minion, you stalk down the Neckbeard, who had to go and eat some dinner or something.

Stalking him through the spacious candle-lit corridor, you slit your wrist, and let the blood seep into the bloody vial you used to eat that weird soup.

After about an hour, he gets up from his feast, and heads back to where the beds are, you pursue him to there, sticking to the shadows with graceful, silent steps towards your future servant.

As he lays his bloated body down to rest, you bring out the vial you filled with your own, vampiric blood. In the course of 15 or so minutes, he's fallen asleep. You creep ever silently up to him, and withdraw the cork in the vial that halts the tainted blood from seeping out. You raise the vial just above this incarnation of obesity's mouth and...

"HEY! YOU WHO ARE YOU!? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO FRANK?"

The more muscled human screams some gibberish in the language all of the explorers seem to speak (although it has been translated for convenience's sake).

You quickly retrieve the vial back into one of the various pockets in your explorer's outfit, lest some of the precious and dangerous blood spill.

Looks like you have a boss fight on your hands

INVENTORY
Clothes
Wearing:
>explorer's outfit
>explorer's hat
Not wearing:
>ancient battle armour
>cape
>leather boots
>tuxedo

Weapons:
>cutlass

Other stuff
>Beautiful Gem
>Vials of Blood (x6)
>Vial of Vampiric blood
>Parchment with 'scribbles' on it.
>Some weird, small, reflective round thing with a hole in it that also has scribbles on it
>one of those gunpowder things from before
>candy corn that has always been there

[Decker]

Cutlass -> Rectum

[Fooflyer]

Cutlass -> Rectum

While the behemoth of a man charges at you, you adeptly draw your cutlass from the sheath that has obviously always been at your waist and do a quick dodge.

Getting behind him, you attempt to shove the blade into the deeper parts of his anal cavities.

Your prey, however, swings his arm in a revolution before your plan can even initiate and he catches you square in the mouth, forcing you to lose some precious blood.

Health: 80/100
Boss' Health: 50/50

[Decker]

Offer him the candy corn? Surely you can just bribe the pain away

[Fooflyer]

Offer him the candy corn? Surely you can just bribe the pain away

You dodge another blow by a hair, and an idea of trickery presents itself into your devious mind: you will bribe him with the candy corn, and while he is busy eating it, you will impale his head and drink the blood from his heart!

The plan is a partial success, even though he refuses to accept the candy corn, he leaves himself open when you shock him by speaking the old language and manage to slash him a bit, drawing precious lifeblood.

Health: 80/100
Boss' Health: 40/50

[Decker]

Wear -> Ancient Battle Armour

Why you are not wearing this for a battle is beyond me but this should be rectified

[hotb]

>MSpaint Adventures reference.

[Fooflyer]

Wear -> Ancient Battle Armour

Why you are not wearing this for a battle is beyond me but this should be rectified

You decide to consecrate yourself with the unholy and fearsome powers of the ancient battle armour.

Although reducing your abilities to dodge tremendously, it causes your foes to reveal in the horror of the vile deeds your father committed and cause insanity in it's purest form

You hold steadfast, an indestructible fortress of fear that reigns eternal.
The massive hulk of muscle routes from the duel, and comes back later screaming with the face of the booksmarts human worn as a mask.
Despite what you would have otherwise thought as an easy fight, the man fights like a cornered rat, savage and relentless.

You do manage to do quit a bit of damage to him, though.

Health: 50/100
Boss' Health: 20/50

[hotb]

Smash a vial of blood in his face, then cut him a lot with your cutlass.

[Fooflyer]

Smash a vial of blood in his face, then cut him a lot with your cutlass.

You draw out one of the vials of blood and hold it in your hand as you palm him in the face.
The ensuring result is that the savage thing that was once a man now has glass in his face, not to mention the blood that spilled on you rejuvenating your health.
As he screams and stumbles back in horror at the pain you caused him, you quickly deliver a multitude of blows like the postman from hell.

It is time you cast the finishing blow

Health: 70/100
Boss' Health: 0/50

INVENTORY
Clothes
Wearing:
>ancient battle armour
Not wearing:
>explorer's outfit
>explore'rs hat
>cape
>leather boots
>tuxedo

Weapons:
>cutlass

Other stuff
>Beautiful Gem
>Vials of Blood (x5)
>Vial of Vampiric blood
>Parchment with 'scribbles' on it.
>Some weird, small, reflective round thing with a hole in it that also has scribbles on it
>one of those gunpowder things from before

[Odds]

BEAT UP EVERYONE

MAKE THEM CONTRACT PORPHYRIC HEMOPHILIA