The ADVENTURES of M.G. Fink, Daring Thief!

[Zink]

I like how both of you guys paid attention to the last part of my post instead of just blindly posting suggestions.

[Sloth]

I didn't like the RPG idea. I thought my post kind of made that obvious, but I guess I'll just vote "no" on RPG.

[Avengifier]

Hmm... the RPG style seems easier, but the suggestion method would be more fun. I think I'd prefer suggestions.

Also,

The nametag was meant for a desk

When you said nametag I assumed it was a security card or something. Whoops...

[Zink]

Meh, I didn't explain the two options properly anyway. I figure I'll do sort of a combination of both. You know, basically like have HP but have the actions be what people suggest. Basically I'd keep it open ended but put some RPG elements in the steamline it a little bit.

[Karilyn]

The RPG method sounds boring. I vote suggestion, and roll with it, more fun that way.

That being said, it's a fucking old man, and a really heavy robot.

Shoot the old man in his kneecaps and/or shins, then thrown his limp body in front of the robot.

[Avengifier]

Sounds good.

Try to kill the robot by shooting it, or if your gun is ineffective try to knock out the old man controlling it by throwing the dictionary at his head.

[gigoergong]

Trick the Robot into going out the window. When it falls on the street drop the safe on it. (SEE? YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN YOU'LL NEED THESE THINGS.)

Staple some papers on the old man's head and get out of there!







Suggestions over RPG.

[Zink]

(Okay, I decided I'm going about it this way. We are going to use suggestions like everyone wants, but I'm going to describe how many points of damage each hit does. It really doesn't matter, but at least it gives us a method to compare the affectiveness of different kinds of attacks, plus see how powerful one thing is compared to another. But mostly I just feel like it.)

The Security Robo attacks!

Insult the old man and his robot. Shoot the gun wildly and hope you hit something.

You yell some profanities and begin firing your gun all over the place. One of the shots grazes the robo. It does 3 points of damage!

The robo begins charging it's lazuh.

Shoot the old man in his kneecaps and/or shins, then thrown his limp body in front of the robot.

You aim at the oldish man, but before you can fire the robot fires it's lazuh. It does 59 points of damage!

You're probably going to want to take out that robot before you do anything about that oldish man.

Try to kill the robot by shooting it, or if your gun is ineffective try to knock out the old man controlling it by throwing the dictionary at his head.

You shoot at the robot a few times. It does 32 points of damage! You decide to throw your dictionary at the oldish man to try and knock him out, but the robot manages to block the throw. Those small, rusty looking wheels can actually move really fast. At least it does 14 points of damage.

"TARGET LOCKED. READYING MACHINE GUN"

That did NOT sound like a good thing. In fact, if you were to put it in a category, you would probably put it in the category of "Bad thing"!

(Also, the man is not "old" he is "oldish". There is quite a large difference.)

[Sloth]

Realize all hope is lost. Pull out pieces of glass and prepare to commit suicide.


Realize your a coward and can't do it. Throw the glass away from you, which accidentally hits the oldish man.

[gigoergong]

Throw the oldish man out the window. See if the robot follows him.

























...Then drop the safe...

[Avengifier]

Jump the hell out of the way of the machine gun, sprint around the room if you have to.

You're probably going to want to take out that robot before you do anything about that oldish man.

Just shoot it repeatedly until it dies. That seems to be mildly effective.

[Karilyn]

Use the old man as a human shield.

Trick the robot into shooting him.

[gigoergong]

Check your dictionary to see if it can tell you how to defeat this robot. If all else fails, use the bloodied lint, the name tag, and expensive pen to somehow win.

[Zink]

Trick the Robot into going out the window. When it falls on the street drop the safe on it. (SEE? YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN YOU'LL NEED THESE THINGS.)

Staple some papers on the old man's head and get out of there!

You attempt to use some so good ol' fashioned TOMFOOLERY on the robot.
"SILLY HUMAN. YOU CANNOT FOOL THAT WHICH DOES NOT THINK"
In other words, it didn't work. And you're REALLY GOOD at TOMFOOLERY, too!

Realize all hope is lost. Pull out pieces of glass and prepare to commit suicide.


Realize your a coward and can't do it. Throw the glass away from you, which accidentally hits the oldish man.

This is where it's going to end, you realize. You are going to be torn to shreds by a security bot while an oldish man watches and laughs. You decide to take a shard of glass and just end it all now. However, you realize you don't have the guts it takes to kill yourself. You toss the glass, which ends up accidentally hitting the old man. It only does like three or four points of damage, though.

Throw the oldish man out the window. See if the robot follows him.
...Then drop the safe...

You can't, on account of the robot of death right in front of him. You try anyway though, but the robot just slams into you. It does 10 points of damage.

Jump the hell out of the way of the machine gun, sprint around the room if you have to.

The robot opens fire with it's machine gun. You begin to run around the room like a maniac to try and dodge as many as you can. You actually do a reasonably good job and only take 35 damage.

Just shoot it repeatedly until it dies. That seems to be mildly effective.

You begin firing at the robot over and over again. The robot is unable to charge up it's weapons while being hit, so it just takes the beating. In total it takes 217 points of damage. You feel like an idiot for not thinking of this surprisingly easy solution earlier.

The security bot is vanquished!

Suddenly, the oldish man springs to action and knocks you revolver out of your hand.

"You think you so tough, mister fancy hat? I think it's time we settle this like MEN!"

The oldish man prepares to attack!

[Avengifier]

Punch the oldish man with your super speedy thief moves.

Also, you might want to grab a circuit board or something from the robot to see if you can find out more about the old man and his mysterious robots.