AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Lioness wrote:

DudeWheresMyPikachu wrote:I'm surprised no ones arrested him yet.

Or put him in an insane asylum for that matter.

Funny you should mention that. When Chris was in fourth grade, he had a chance to become a normal person.

See, for reasons that are unknown, Chris was sent to the principal of his school. Likely because he got a "F" in something. The principal put him on his lap to console him, and according to Chris "said offensive things to him".

Chris probably meant "He said he wouldn't change my grade or fire the teacher or that I'd have to improve on myself ohmigodohmigodohmigod".

This made Chris scream and hide under the principal's desk. He refused to sit on his lap, despite the principal's attempts to calm him down. This fit became so severe that four other people were called in to restrain Chris. One of them brought a tape recorder to record Chris's screams (likely to use as evidence in the event his parents tried to sue).

Bob was called and Chris was pulled out of school. Here, the chance was lost. Chris told his version of events to Bob, who instantly assumed that Chris was telling the truth. In Chris's version, he was suddenly yanked out of class for no reason and forced to sit on the principal's lap. When he tried to run away, more faculty members appeared, held him down roughly, and recorded his screams for their own perverse schemes. Bob assumed that the principal was a homosexual and Chris agreed. It should be noted that Chris wasn't lying, he just didn't understand why he'd wound up in the principal's office to begin with.

Chris's parents attempted to sue the school system for child abuse, only to have their entire case blown out of the water by the aforementioned recordings. The school then attempted to get Chris sent to what his parents call a "Mental Institution" but it was probably a special boarding school full of professionals who knew how to deal with autism. Chris's parents panicked and Bob moved Chris to Richmond for the rest of his public schooling career. And then Chris grew up into the idiot we all know today.

I believe the principal was trying to help, but really? In what situation does trying to put a ten-year-old child on your lap turn out well? Only Santa Claus gets away with that.

It's also interesting how many people have died who are tied into Chris-chan mythos. It may be coincidence, but it's really creepy to hear about.

I find it very sad that there is so much suspicion between parents and teachers nowadays.

In the 50s teachers were TRUSTED. They were allowed to punish the children when they felt it was deserved and they were also allowed to get personal with their students; to sit the small kids down on their lap and just offer some support.

Now teachers (like my mom, who teaches preschool) can hardly even TOUCH their students because the kid will tell their mommy and their mommy will sue the teacher for molestation.

One of the reasons why kids are so unrulely these days.

Ultra Bidoof wrote:Long story about principal incident

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Sorry, I was repeatedly bashing my head against my keyboard. The reasons should be obvious.

Parents are becoming so stupid. They all seem to believe that their children are little angels who would never do anything wrong.

True story: mom made a kid go to the 'principal's' office (she's more of a supervisor than a principal) because he was HITTING AND BITING KIDS. AND MY MOM. The mother of said biter got rustled, screamed about how her little boy would never do such a thing, and pulled him out of the preschool.

Feel free to headdesk.

Oh and if you're wondering why I told that story, it's because Chris-chan's parents apparently thought the teachers were perverted quacks. THEIR LITTLE INNOCENT BOY WAS SUBJECTED TO CRUEL TREATMENT AT THE HANDS OF PERVERTED TEACHERS WHO DELIGHT IN THE SCREAMS OF CHILDREN.

God damnit.

Does Chris have one redeeming story about him?
One that makes him look like a human being?

Fuck, what's with all these faces

Nooo, you ruined it Dude

Coriserai wrote: True story: mom made a kid go to the 'principal's' office (she's more of a supervisor than a principal) because he was HITTING AND BITING KIDS. AND MY MOM. The mother of said biter got rustled, screamed about how her little boy would never do such a thing, and pulled him out of the preschool.

Feel free to headdesk.

I'll headkeyboard, thank you.

*ahem*dogdigzjcx if djgdj dyd djgxjg j xjgwj

But look at the bright side! They don't have to put up with that brat anymore! And they don't have to put up with the kid, either!

DudeWheresMyPikachu wrote:God damnit.

Does Chris have one redeeming story about him?
One that makes him look like a human being?

Well, he did take his Wii to The GAMe PLACe so the kids who go there could play Brawl.
Thats pretty much it

there must have been an ulterior motive to that

vealin99 wrote:there must have been an ulterior motive to that

well he was on shaky ground when he did that

alright boys, that about covers it
lets send this case to the precinct and grab some coffee

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dFeGkOvX ... r_embedded


Did he just do what I think he did?

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