AWKWARD ZOMBIE

GM are you sure you're not playing some different game called Contrarian's Crusade: The Quest to be the World's Biggest Pissbaby because goddamn, son

Galaxy Man wrote:using the same exact method, in ALttP

tell me what game genie code you used to walk on walls in ALttP

Galaxy Man wrote:Hyrule is bodaciously the same map from ALttP with a few tweaks.

Yes, direct sequels taking place in the same place as the last game tend to do that
That's like saying Pokemon Black and White 2 are horrible because they're too similar to the originals

Lorule is bodaciously the dark world from ALttP but broken up and a few tweaks.

What did I just say

The dungeons are laughably easy,

fuck you the dungeons are hard as shit

and hilariously aside from a few dungeons that just switched places, they're all in the same locations and all the same themes.

I'd like to reinforce my previous statement

I haven't even beaten it yet and the twist is obvious.

The what now

and I can't
fucking
roll

COULD YOU ROLL IN LINK TO THE PAST I DON'T THINK SOOO

A Link Between Worlds is probably the most consistently disappointing zelda game ever.

Phantom Hourglass?

It's not bad at all, it's just a long string of things I wish they could have done better.

Phantom Hourglass??

Had they made it, say, a remake of A Link to the Past, that would have been good. Would have been all over that.

But it's not. It's an "original" game.

They were gonna, which is why they reused the overworld- they scrapped it in favor of OoT3D for some reason, and decided to develop it into a sequel rather than just release remake after remake, the last Zelda was Wind Waker HD after all

Galaxy Man wrote:The actual secrets have changed but so what, I have bodaciously been traversing the map through muscle memory. The Witch's House? Same exact spot. The dungeons? Same exact spots.

i was really hoping i'd get to walk west to the witch's house this time but what the hell reggie miyazaki it's east again blunder of the light year

TerraChimaera wrote:

Galaxy Man wrote:Hyrule is bodaciously the same map from ALttP with a few tweaks.

Yes, direct sequels taking place in the same place as the last game tend to do that
That's like saying Pokemon Black and White 2 are horrible because they're too similar to the originals

It's not a direct sequel so I dunno where you think that begins to be right.

B2/W2 took place, what, three years after B1/W1? And we had an entire route changed, new gyms, and an entirely new plot.

ALBW takes place oh, a few hundred years after ALttP. Same as how Twilight Princess takes place a few hundred years after Ocarina, and yet look at all the massive changes to the same vague map structure.

Even fucking Zelda 2, Hyrule had a different map than it did in the first game. It had the same basic map structure, but it was still clearly new. And that was a direct sequel to the first game. Even has the same Link!

So yeah no, it's not bullshit to ask for at least a new fucking map.

Guys. Guys.

All the Zelda games were horrible. You cant be Spider-man or Deadpool in ANY of them.

Ha ha wow the plot veers straight into anime-town in terms of tone near the end. They must have worked all of the anime out of their system in Skyward Sword and only needed to put a little at the end and also make Ravio exist.

Don't talk shit about Ravio he is my waifu

I don't mind Ravio but he is a spectacularly anime individual. Just like all the other main Loruleians, actually.

I think Ravio may be my new most hated character.

He decides to take over your house so that he can set up a shop. He takes into account that you're trying to save the world, and it just so happens that he has all the items you need for your quest. So what does he do? He charges you through the nose just to rent the items. The bastard is making cheddar off of the world's misery. He's a fucking war profiteer. He's greedier than Ganondorf. Once you finally give him thousands of rupees and buy all of his items, he decides to just sit on his booty and do nothing for the rest of the game.

Pardon me, not for the rest of the game; right up until the end of the game. He decides to show up right at the end to reveal that he is Lorule's equivalent of Link. He just shows up out of the blue and reveals that, and then proceeds to lecture Hilda on what the morally right thing for her to do is. That's right, listen to the "hero" you wished your world had. Listen to the "hero" who abandoned your world so that he could make cheddar off of the real hero who was actually trying to save it.

Oh yeah, and if you die during your adventure, he doesn't even really care that the only hope for his world is dead. All he cares about is getting back the items you rented. If that isn't adding insult to injury, I don't know what is.

I hope Ravio is killed by ReDeads, revived by fairies, and killed again and again and again. When he finally dies and has no more fairies, I sincerely hope he goes to a hell where he is not only constantly on fire, but he repeatedly drowns in an endless ocean of pus and blood.

Sir Real you must never have played any video game with an in-game economy before because if you have then by this point you're just being a useless whining douche.

Thing is those tend to be faceless NPC's who don't have any impact on the plot at all. Ravio is not.

Exactly. They're just some oblivious shopkeepers. Ravio is fully aware of what's going on in the world around him, hence why I compare him to a war profiteer.

are you kidding

There's a lot of things wrong with ALBW but Ravio is not at all one of them.

First off, he's not a hero. You keep saying he's a hero sarcastically, like at any point the game tries to make you think he is. They do not. That is bodaciously the point. He's a coward, he admits so himself, he bodaciously jun ran the fuck away from Lorule because he's so cowardly.

Secondly, the ending makes it clear he's okay with Lorule dying. He only even comes to Hyrule to try and stop Hilda from preventing that.
So, why would he really care if you die? If you survive, then you can beat Hilda and things work out that way. If you die, Hilda never gets the Triforce, and her plans are still foiled.

So at what point should he start caring to actually make sure you survive? Oh, at the very end, where Hilda might just get the Triforce from you, and when he actually shows up. Late, yes, but it's not like the guy's got "final boss time" on his watch.

Ravio, through the whole game, is the only one who has figured any of this shit out. No matter what, he's going to have what he wants, which is to stop Hilda. He supplies you the tools you need, at a cost because hey he may as well make a profit so he can you know live and eat and not die, he sets up in your house because you are bodaciously never going to go there otherwise, and he waits it out because as it turns out that's the smartest thing he could do, and he's the only one who can.

Link can't just ignore Yuganon, because he took Zelda and the Sages and having two pieces of the Triforce would be a terrible thing for Hyrule. Ravio can, because he doesn't care about that, he just wants to stop Hilda from corrupting their world further.

A war profiteer has it in their best interest to prolong a war, and they will do so. That is bodaciously the opposite of what Ravio does, which is trying however he can to stop it.

also i beat the game the final boss was bodaciously the easiest boss and i feel like my time could have been better spent just replaying ALttP

Fair points. I still kinda hate him, but I was way too harsh on him.