Pokemon Emerald Cry Edition: i.e. Lolita does a Nuzlocke

[corsica]

god dang

okay so i'll try to stop playing persona 3 portable for like 2 seconds (mostly since i finally maxed akihiko's s-link, sploooosh) but yeah i'll update as soon as i caaaaaaaan

[Terraem]

What's more important: Akihiko wearing his lovely tight speedos or your pokemon family?

[corsica]

What's more important: Akihiko wearing his lovely tight speedos or your pokemon family?

akihiko why would you even ask

[corsica]

i'm bodaciously killing myself for finals so gimme a bit and i will try to update i just

finals

finals

[Shining Charizard]

Finals are more important than imaginary magical monsters.

[corsica]

so all my finals are take-home and once i get help on my 3D one i should be updating

[corsica]

all right nerds

expect an update tuesday

[Liraxus]

Not to pressure you or anything, but it's Tuesday, but if you're too deep in schoolwork, then hold it off, we can wait.

[corsica]

no my computer was broken but i fixed it

OKAY HERE WE GO




since hitman kind of died i guess you're in citation



now sit back and do nothing while reaping rewards



since mr. briney just kind of fucked off i guess i have to surf errywhere on my own now

to slateport i guess



protip

this part of the game is super annoying



so how high are you right now, exactly



i'm pretty sure i forgot to buy repels oh boy this will be fun



sup nerd



doing exercise is awful what are you even talking about



it was uneventful



he doesn't even have a pokemon that knows surf how did he even get there



whateverrrr



jesus fucking christ carvanha is terrifying

(terraem likes it rough ccccc; )



oh fuck you



ollies out



wait what



haaaaate



god i fuckin hate wingull



dude i'm on a pokemon i'm pretty sure it can catch you



oh my god all these fuckers have tentacools and wingulls i'm gonna strangle something



it took like 3 pokemon to get rid of his first tentacool ughh



r u fuckin kitten me



i swear to god this better be worthwhile



are you fucking serious



hhhhhhhaaaaaaatttteeeeee



just

fucking

kick his booty please



strength managed to finally take it out



are you serious right now







terraem is bodaciously on the verge of death and i still can't escape why does this game hate me so much



i switch to michi and she manages to escape



look at that trippy-booty screenshot



oh yeah i healed terraem somehow



fffffffffffuck



terraem why are you so shit will you just evolve already



cmon sia don't be a pile of shit



and then i beat him



this would've been so much easier in a goddamn boat



i had to switch to fucking pumkin because the fucking wingull kept using supersonic the fucking asshole



i beat a couple more trainers



oh boy i get to beat the shit out of two children at once

have fun calming your little brother down after i make him cry



you can pretty easily guess how this went



take a snooze in the middle of the ocean

you know i don't even think i have to shove your head down in the water like i was planning



it's okay, nobody is

i am the ice queen sitting on the frozen throne



oh my god why are there so many goddamn trainers



no i'm trying to get away from you assholes



man i just realized i haven't caught a wild pokemon this route yet



welp



whatever



have fun in the box



man really i just caught a pokemon



fucking christ



pelliper you fucking piece of shit i hate you so much



i'm already in a happily commited relationship with food, thanks



flubbed out






fuckin finally i can heal my pokemon up



gonna go back and battle a couple trainers i missed. i'll hit up the abandoned ship l8r



sup nerds



beating up children will never get old



oh

am i uh

interrupting something



haha oh shit i'm pretty sure i just interrupted them about to make out



they're tedious at best



still, sia and citation were kind of a shitty matchup



haha i interrupted their sex and i also beat the shit out of them. 2 for 2



never have i ever seen a more accurate depiction of my life than in that screenshot



finally

finally

somebody worth fighting



they're really frustrating because the fuckin wailmer keeps using rollout



aw fuck you



including the arctic



why the fuck do so many of these assholes have tentacruels



it was long and boring so i spared the details



manectric would be more of an issue if i didn't have two pokemon that resisted it

except if you attack it directly it can still paralyze ground types which is super dumb



citation barely manages to hang on after a water gun hit



the cooltrainers are best to battle because they're not a gigantic waste of time



why do you have two manectrics

whatever i beat them and take their cheddar



i buy some stuff and whoa what's up watson



you're an old dude so i guess i won't browbeat you for saying that



please do not let it be of the sexual variety

even i have standards





oh that's it? a'ight, seems easy enough



he gives me the key and i ollie out to new mauvile



man watson is so cool



wtf i never noticed this sign before



wow

ok



what



wow, okay, they're really comparing dicks on a sign

gj guys



well this seems to be the place



this should be easy enough



man this place is weird lookin'



so basically if you press a certain switch a door will open and then a different door will close it's really easy



oh sup



i needed an electric type so



i spent like 3 fuckin hours grinding that spoink so your legacy isn't going to die that easily, hitman

there u go



oh shit i'm pretty sure i forgot to buy repels



goddammit



if this is a voltorb i swear to god



oh neat



fucking



are you serious



fuck off



UGH



THIS IS THE WORST AREA



IT WAS A VOLTORB ARE YOU SERIOUS



UGHHGHGHHGH



oh shit which one is the voltorb



i guess i'll choose this one



FUCK



goddammit no wonder watson didn't wanna come here



fucking finally i'm here



goddammit



not really worth it but okay



god can i just get out of here please



yeah it was shit can i have my reward now



well

thunderbolt is a good move

so okay



okay cool i'm gonna go now



now to...idk the next gym i guess



oh hey it's those guys again



lol later nerds



omg it's steven

splooooosh



can i please bear your children



i may or may not have our meeting embedded into my mind



i am throwing myself at you, ughh



goddammit



i'll raise something of yours c;



like in a hotel or something in the middle of nowhere

just think about it



sighhh

okay nerds long update today because of how long u had to wait

l8r

[Galaxy Man]

god i wish steven was just

every gym leader

every elite four anyone

and then at the end you didn't go to the hall of fame

you just went to bed~

[Exeres]

Lolita used Attract.

But it failed.

[Kamak]

Such is the life of Lolita.

[Guyperson]

You didn't have to go the long way through the sea
There was a much shorter, much less tentacooly path on route 103

[Kamak]

Loli does everything hardcore.

I bet she healed on Dewford though, like a chump.

[iamthelordhitman]

Voltorb?

I am OK with this. Gotta go fast