AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Just now I was on the phone to this customer service person and they asked me for the second and fifth letters of my secret answer and I said "A and T, please" like I was on fucking countdown or something

Head of The Brothel wrote:Just now I was on the phone to this customer service person and they asked me for the second and fifth letters of my secret answer and I said "A and T, please" like I was on fucking countdown or something

Who does that? If someone managed to have the answer to any of my secret question, they'd be more than capable of writing it down and regurgitating that criteria. Asking for specific letters sounds retardedly complicated for no real reason.

I would guess it's so that the person on the other end doesn't know my secret answer

So me and a friend were lying in our beds in a hostel somewhere and she was all 'I feel creepy talking to people sometimes' and I tried to explain to her that she shouldn't feel creepy - creep level is all down to context and a lot of that context is how you personally appear. I pointed out that she outwardly seems to be a really nice and personable human so shouldn't feel weird, whereas I look like Fondell Von Touchup and so really have to watch my step sometimes.
She didn't understand. I had to think of an example.

I brought up the time she started talking about masturbation and it then evolved into a delightfully funny conversation for the whole group. I then, to prove my point, stared deeply into her eyes, and stated in stern monotone the word "Masturbation".

"...see? Wasn't that creepy?"
"Just a bit. Blubber, you do realise you are topless and lying in bed, right?"
"..."
"..."
"...I did say context is important!"
"..."
"Godammnit ok, look my hands are up here, alright?"

Thankfully we burst out laughing at this point.

Head of The Brothel wrote:I would guess it's so that the person on the other end doesn't know my secret answer

Let me have some guesses

BALLTRAIN
GAY4TAILS
HABITUALLYHANDLESSELF
FAGOT

was I close I bet I was

I'm impressed that you are dedicated enough to the cause to make those work

Only the best for "forum big-shot princess brothel"

people be lining up for miles to suck my dick but don't worry I got your mum a fast track ticket

Oh cool dude, she'll be really grateful for that

she's being using this training technique with loaves of frozen garlic bread for next time

she says it isn't really a good match for size or shape but the strong smell mixed with the way saliva makes it go limp with bits crumbling off after a minute or two is a perfect analogue for brothel dick

buddy you got a treat coming your way

my member glurries in anticipation

so should

should you toast it for a garlic rub prior or

you apply the globby red mixture and eat it like bruschetta

I microwave mine

And I'm no longer hungry.

Guys you're killing me, haha.

Anyway, we went to a pub two days ago and ran into an older guy who was an acquittance of one of us. He also happened to work IT in the college of another one of us. So he stayed with us with rest of the evening, which was kind of weird but we didn't think too much of it seeing that we were drunk. Then the next day the other guy went to IT and the older dude was there, and he had apparently memorised the guy's 9-digit Student ID. Creepy.

Next time I shower I'll try not to forget to bring a towel.