AWKWARD ZOMBIE

all i can think about is drinking

The garage boss is pushing the talk with my employment day by day, but only because he's busy and he can't manage to make free time for me (which I definitely know is true).

However, I'm getting such a bad feeling about this... I should call him again tomorrow, and I'm really nervous. I hope things work out, and I'm not going to get some stupid stuff like they can't employ me because they can't fulfill the terms for a female mechanic quick enough or something. Or they pick someone else.
Or what about
And then there's
And also
Not to mention



Oh my god

it's hard to sleep when you hate yourself so much

I've been having hip pain since mid-march (back when it felt like a cramp) but the past few weeks it's gotten really bad. I've recently been almost completely unable to sit upright in a chair and have to either stand or lay down. Finally got in to see a doctor earlier today (well, yesterday) when mom realized it was getting worse and wasn't a result of me "laying around", and they're not sure what it might be because I didn't injure myself in something like a fall or car accident, and they don't know what's up. Had x rays done which might tell us what's up, but if it doesn't, it could be soft tissue issues, which could be anywhere from ligament deterioration to bursitis, to blood clots, or even, what I hope against everything it won't be, cancer (very unlikely, but not able to be ruled out).

On pain meds now, but I kinda feel shitty about this and want answers soon. I hope it's just something minor, but I don't know.

So sorry if I've been kinda quiet recently. Been mostly surfing AZ on my phone, so I can't do too much. I also feel bad about not updating the Pokemon TCG thread, but I can't do updates that long without sitting and the pain is unbearable.

Ugh, I wish it'd just all go away.

I think I've developed a sincere hatred of the word 'friend'.

I think I hate it because people use it so loosely and freely that it becomes meaningless.

What about "buddy?"

Better but still subtly irritating.

I would personally err on using 'acquaintance' rather than 'friend' in most instances; 'Friend' is a word I would only ever use very sparingly for people I can really trust.

i have a friend who calls people "friend" like just regularly to everyone

it's always really awkward to have someone ask him something hear him say "sure, friend" without any hint of sarcasm to this guy he just met

If someone I didn't know was casually calling me friend in conversation like that, I'd probably assume they were doing it sarcastically.

Of course I wouldn't take offense probably because I'm hella sarcastic as well.

Friend'o'Buddy'o'Pal!

I feel as though I despise most of the human race yet I still feel the obligation to get a job that will help humanity. I also have social anxiety and have trouble talking to people as well as posting online because I'm worried people won't like me.

Sometimes I go on a research binge, just clicking from article to article, and have to pull myself out when I start trying to comprehend theories such as the universe being a simulation or one of many alternates, especially when there's a fuckton of science to go along with it.

I don't always want to resolve conflicts.

I recently had a fight with someone and I'm finding it a lot easier to actively try to resent him for it than to just let it go.

YCobb wrote:I don't always want to resolve conflicts.

I recently had a fight with someone and I'm finding it a lot easier to actively try to resent him for it than to just let it go.

Hell, thats what Ive been doing for over ten years now. Resentment becomes its own reward after a while

I have a habit of running out of snacks before I run out of "real food", so I end up going to the grocery store just to get stuff like cookies and ice cream and nothing else.

...I use the self-checkout for those moments. I don't want the cashiers to judge me for my ravenous sweet tooth.