AWKWARD ZOMBIE

You are KOTZUG HEADSMASHA, an ORK NOB currently in between battles. You find yourself in side of a room that seems to have been cobbled together quickly from bits of scrap inside of a cave. In your hands is your trusty CHOPPA, a crude axe-like weapon, and your KUSTOM SHOOTA, a massive and barbaric looking double barreled machine gun.

You are aware of a knocking sound at the DOOR to your left.

shoot the door

Then check who it is

punch bits of scrap

> If the mysterious visitor wasn't killed by the gun blasts, invite him or her or it inside

Deiphobus wrote:shoot the door

You fire at the door. It is utterly destroyed.

Reubo wrote:Punch bits of scrap

In the excitement you punch the wall. "DAT WAS ZOGGIN AWZUM!"

ogihci wrote: check who it is

You walk to the remains of the door and see three GROTS, small, scrawny, big nosed, long eared, beady eyed greenskins. One is now clutching a new hole in its face.

Sloth wrote:> If the mysterious visitor wasn't killed by the gun blasts, invite him or her or it inside

"WOT DO YA MAGGOTY ARSES WANT?"

one of the GROTS relieves himself before you while the other, curled in a ball, squeaks "DA BOSS SENT UZ TA TELLZ YOU 'EE 'AZ A JOB FER YOU!"

fuck grots

lean in close to grots and ask what said job is

enjoy a cool, refreshing bottle of green tea

give grots piggyback ride

Reubo wrote:fuck grots

...You decide these two aren't worth the waste of space. There are only 62,873,920 on this ROK alone.
You behead the one in the wet pants while simultaneously stomping its companion...

oghci wrote:lean in close to grots and ask what said job is

...After first leaning in closer to the worthless things.
"Wot'z dat SQUIG kissa wont wif me an' me BOYZ now, eh?"

The GROT squeals. "'EE wantz ya to squish some of dem CHAOS ladz down planetside! Don' hit me face!"

Deiphobus wrote:enjoy a cool, refreshing bottle of green tea

Real orks drink FUNGUS BEER

Fooflyer wrote:give grots piggyback ride

You have no idea what a pig is, but you decide to lift up the GROT curled in a ball and run around with him on your back. This looks incredibly un orky so you drop him and... well you know.

Now you must get your BOYZ rounded up and prepare to head planetside.

kick open the door to the local pub/eatery

shake booty

attract boyz

something isn't right here, call up your most trusted orkvestegator, Inspekta Gubbinz to do some sneaky investigating

this is best ever

>retrieve arms from hole in wall