Bad day? Let Torizo tell you why you're still AWESOME.
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Superior Bacon
- Most Important Member
- Posts: 16573
- Joined: Tue Mar 24, 2009 6:57 am
- Location: alcoholism, oregon
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Miss Starseed
- Posts: 7469
- Joined: Thu Jul 05, 2007 5:13 pm
- Location: butts
I don't know what to do anymore.
I go to work and try ridiculously fucking hard to stay positive - I really hate having to ask for help, especially if the "help" is delivered with snide remarks, blank "are you an idiot or something?" stares, or general assholeishness. And unfortunately, because they apparently couldn't just set one day aside to train me and make sure I understood everything, I work on a "learn as you go" basis, and my coworkers can't help themselves when it comes to "DEAR GOD I HATE TRAINEES I WILL BE A FUCKING DICK FOR NO REASON".
Last night, I went to work with a sore stomach. I figured I'd just tough it out because this was only my fifth day and I didn't want to look like a dick if I called in sick already, especially for just a sore stomach. No matter how I moved though, I was in constant pain, and the person who was assigned to - AHEM - supposedly hover over me constantly and help me a long the way, decided her time would be better spent spending the extent of my time there in the back, washing dishes or just completely fucking disappearing, leaving me to fend for myself with cash registers I am unfamiliar with, as well as preparing any desserts (DID I MENTION THIS IS A GODDAMN DAIRY QUEEN?) and following any "rules" there are in place I don't fucking know about till its too late to avoid some other co-workers attitude.
Oh, and it's my first job, so that's just awesome. No experience working any kind of ice-cream machines (ALL DQ DESSERTS INVOLVING ICE-CREAM MUST BE MADE WITH A BALL AND THE TRADEMARKED CURL ON TOP. NO EXCEPTIONS. EVEN IF IT'S AN ICE-CREAM SANDWICH AND YOU'RE JUST GOING TO SMUSH A COOKIE ON TOP OF THE CURL AND BALL ANWYAYS.) or cash registers, and that's all I do. And everyone bitches me out for asking questions, even if I'm JUST MAKING SURE I'm doing my FUCKING JOB right!
For example, and going back to what I said earlier about these "rules": I was the only one up front while my trainer disappeared in the back once again, and the only other employees that weren't cooks were the manager (upstairs) or the girl working drive-thru. Unexpectedly, a few people start coming in. I wouldn't really call it "busy", but for someone on their fifth day with very limited experience regarding the registers and products, it was a panic-inducing nightmare when even a line-up of three customers started. I do my best to manage and remain calm and friendly, and after I'm done my part of fixing ice-cream and drinks, I think "Hey, I'll start bagging the food now!" NO FUCK YOU says the cook who has been an asshole to me every. single. time. I've ever. talked. to him. I seriously am afraid to even run into him in the parking lot on my way in/out of the building. He ALWAYS gives me dirty looks and treats me like I'm nothing more than a speck of disgusting shit. He informs me I'm not allowed to TOUCH the food until the order is completely done, and then he'll call it up. I actually shrunk back and basically just squeaked an apology in response, and asked if he'd like me to put everything back I had already bagged. Apparently I should have just assumed this because GOD FORBID, I ask him anything just to make sure, because he glares at me as though my very existance at that moment was a hinderance to all of humanity. Then he scoffs out "Yes." like it was painful just to say it. I put everything back while the customers who had eagerly been waiting their food eyed me with confused expressions. He didn't even call out the fucking order when everything was ready - I had to go check and list everything off once again on my own, THEN bag it.
Why... why is it such a problem, everytime I just try to ask a question or do my job properly/better? I understand trainees can be annoying but I have not slacked off, I have not constantly asked for breaks (I haven't asked for even ONE break) or time off, I haven't even said I can't work certain shifts or anything. I guess he wouldn't know some of that stuff, but he, among the others, can see me working. They can see me doing what I know how to do to the very best of my ability and doing it with a smile even if I'm struggling. And they still... treat me either so small, or so... rudely.
I don't know how to do anything. It's my first job and I'm not even a month into it and already I'm bitching and moaning like a spoiler brat. Every time I come home from my job I feel like a useless boil on the world who does nothing but be a burden on all of society. I can't even handle co-workers at Dairy Queen not treating me like a delicate little princess. Last night I got fed up with everything - my stomach making everything painful, my co-workers being assholes, and my own stupid feelings, and I asked to go home early. But that just made everything so much worse. When Tuxedo Mask picked me up in the parking lot, I couldn't stop crying. I just wanted to go home and hide away from everything until I rotted away. I didn't want food or to go to bed. I just wanted to go away so I didn't have to put up with myself anymore.
And after much effort on Tuxedo Mask's part to cheer me up, I go to clear my messages on dA and discover the best friend I JUST confided one of my biggest secrets in and told me she completely understood is doing something completely against that. And then... I can't really explain the next part unless I just revealed what I told my friend here, in a public forum, which would be pretty daisies booty backwards when the reason I feel so disgusted and hurt and pathetic is because someone either DOES know what the secret is about and is flaunting it like a sick, twisted bastard, or they have NO IDEA and they're still talking about my private business like they're an expert. It... I can't make it sound like something serious at all without spilling the beans. So if there was a moment this week someone could just look upon me with unadultered pity, this would be a lovely time for that moment to happen if it was in reply to this...
The good news is, Tuxedo Mask and I get the keys to our new apartment Saturday. I work that day. Lovely.
And the cat we will be taking from his mother's incapable hands has started sneezing... a lot, and very gross, goey gobs of snot-sneezes. And like before, she keeps changing her fucking story now. First the cat had a vet appointment. Then she told us the vet said it was nothing to worry about. Then the cat had never gone to the vet in the first place, SHE just decided it was nothing to worry about. Ugh.
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
I go to work and try ridiculously fucking hard to stay positive - I really hate having to ask for help, especially if the "help" is delivered with snide remarks, blank "are you an idiot or something?" stares, or general assholeishness. And unfortunately, because they apparently couldn't just set one day aside to train me and make sure I understood everything, I work on a "learn as you go" basis, and my coworkers can't help themselves when it comes to "DEAR GOD I HATE TRAINEES I WILL BE A FUCKING DICK FOR NO REASON".
Last night, I went to work with a sore stomach. I figured I'd just tough it out because this was only my fifth day and I didn't want to look like a dick if I called in sick already, especially for just a sore stomach. No matter how I moved though, I was in constant pain, and the person who was assigned to - AHEM - supposedly hover over me constantly and help me a long the way, decided her time would be better spent spending the extent of my time there in the back, washing dishes or just completely fucking disappearing, leaving me to fend for myself with cash registers I am unfamiliar with, as well as preparing any desserts (DID I MENTION THIS IS A GODDAMN DAIRY QUEEN?) and following any "rules" there are in place I don't fucking know about till its too late to avoid some other co-workers attitude.
Oh, and it's my first job, so that's just awesome. No experience working any kind of ice-cream machines (ALL DQ DESSERTS INVOLVING ICE-CREAM MUST BE MADE WITH A BALL AND THE TRADEMARKED CURL ON TOP. NO EXCEPTIONS. EVEN IF IT'S AN ICE-CREAM SANDWICH AND YOU'RE JUST GOING TO SMUSH A COOKIE ON TOP OF THE CURL AND BALL ANWYAYS.) or cash registers, and that's all I do. And everyone bitches me out for asking questions, even if I'm JUST MAKING SURE I'm doing my FUCKING JOB right!
For example, and going back to what I said earlier about these "rules": I was the only one up front while my trainer disappeared in the back once again, and the only other employees that weren't cooks were the manager (upstairs) or the girl working drive-thru. Unexpectedly, a few people start coming in. I wouldn't really call it "busy", but for someone on their fifth day with very limited experience regarding the registers and products, it was a panic-inducing nightmare when even a line-up of three customers started. I do my best to manage and remain calm and friendly, and after I'm done my part of fixing ice-cream and drinks, I think "Hey, I'll start bagging the food now!" NO FUCK YOU says the cook who has been an asshole to me every. single. time. I've ever. talked. to him. I seriously am afraid to even run into him in the parking lot on my way in/out of the building. He ALWAYS gives me dirty looks and treats me like I'm nothing more than a speck of disgusting shit. He informs me I'm not allowed to TOUCH the food until the order is completely done, and then he'll call it up. I actually shrunk back and basically just squeaked an apology in response, and asked if he'd like me to put everything back I had already bagged. Apparently I should have just assumed this because GOD FORBID, I ask him anything just to make sure, because he glares at me as though my very existance at that moment was a hinderance to all of humanity. Then he scoffs out "Yes." like it was painful just to say it. I put everything back while the customers who had eagerly been waiting their food eyed me with confused expressions. He didn't even call out the fucking order when everything was ready - I had to go check and list everything off once again on my own, THEN bag it.
Why... why is it such a problem, everytime I just try to ask a question or do my job properly/better? I understand trainees can be annoying but I have not slacked off, I have not constantly asked for breaks (I haven't asked for even ONE break) or time off, I haven't even said I can't work certain shifts or anything. I guess he wouldn't know some of that stuff, but he, among the others, can see me working. They can see me doing what I know how to do to the very best of my ability and doing it with a smile even if I'm struggling. And they still... treat me either so small, or so... rudely.
I don't know how to do anything. It's my first job and I'm not even a month into it and already I'm bitching and moaning like a spoiler brat. Every time I come home from my job I feel like a useless boil on the world who does nothing but be a burden on all of society. I can't even handle co-workers at Dairy Queen not treating me like a delicate little princess. Last night I got fed up with everything - my stomach making everything painful, my co-workers being assholes, and my own stupid feelings, and I asked to go home early. But that just made everything so much worse. When Tuxedo Mask picked me up in the parking lot, I couldn't stop crying. I just wanted to go home and hide away from everything until I rotted away. I didn't want food or to go to bed. I just wanted to go away so I didn't have to put up with myself anymore.
And after much effort on Tuxedo Mask's part to cheer me up, I go to clear my messages on dA and discover the best friend I JUST confided one of my biggest secrets in and told me she completely understood is doing something completely against that. And then... I can't really explain the next part unless I just revealed what I told my friend here, in a public forum, which would be pretty daisies booty backwards when the reason I feel so disgusted and hurt and pathetic is because someone either DOES know what the secret is about and is flaunting it like a sick, twisted bastard, or they have NO IDEA and they're still talking about my private business like they're an expert. It... I can't make it sound like something serious at all without spilling the beans. So if there was a moment this week someone could just look upon me with unadultered pity, this would be a lovely time for that moment to happen if it was in reply to this...
The good news is, Tuxedo Mask and I get the keys to our new apartment Saturday. I work that day. Lovely.
And the cat we will be taking from his mother's incapable hands has started sneezing... a lot, and very gross, goey gobs of snot-sneezes. And like before, she keeps changing her fucking story now. First the cat had a vet appointment. Then she told us the vet said it was nothing to worry about. Then the cat had never gone to the vet in the first place, SHE just decided it was nothing to worry about. Ugh.
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
Serious post
I feel the same way about people helping me, Star. And with such a shitty time like that, it's more than admirable you didn't burst into a fit of rage (i fucking would, but then again, i have the patience of an angered bull). It really does hurt when someone betrays your trust, as your friend on DeviantArt did, I can't imagine how that would feel.
I think you might be trying to hard and I'd say you should relax, but given from what you've said about that chef... he seems to be in a bad mood (all the time?), your trainer or whoever was meant to be helping you sounds irresponsible, and quite the assbutt.
My honest solution is to try and refrain from caring too much, even though that's no help at all.
I really hope you're feeling better.
I think you might be trying to hard and I'd say you should relax, but given from what you've said about that chef... he seems to be in a bad mood (all the time?), your trainer or whoever was meant to be helping you sounds irresponsible, and quite the assbutt.
My honest solution is to try and refrain from caring too much, even though that's no help at all.
I really hope you're feeling better.
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Decker
- turns everyone into furries
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- Joined: Fri Oct 02, 2009 3:14 pm
- Location: 7 out of 10 on the gender binary
If you expect things to change without telling someone at your workplace, then you are waiting for a miracle.
Stop waiting for miracles and go higher up than your dairy queen, go to a higher office and tell them that you haven't been trained and you're being made to feel like shit and the people up there will fucking slap the god daisies piss out of their god daisies stupid asses and do something to help you because, believe it or not, the better you work, the more profit they get, and if you're not working properly they will fix that so they can make more cheddar.
Even if it means your co-workers hate you for going above them, who fucking cares about them? They already treat you like shit and you deserve so much better so just go to a higher office and tell them everything and make sure they do something about it on your behalf.
Stop waiting for miracles and go higher up than your dairy queen, go to a higher office and tell them that you haven't been trained and you're being made to feel like shit and the people up there will fucking slap the god daisies piss out of their god daisies stupid asses and do something to help you because, believe it or not, the better you work, the more profit they get, and if you're not working properly they will fix that so they can make more cheddar.
Even if it means your co-workers hate you for going above them, who fucking cares about them? They already treat you like shit and you deserve so much better so just go to a higher office and tell them everything and make sure they do something about it on your behalf.