AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Everybody currently working nights at my Wendy's has had the job for less than a month, so we almost always get out of there an hour or two after we're supposed to. We're also understaffed, especially for closing, and I am one of two people who can close every night, so guess what I get to do for th...

Yep, I got to 2 non-introductory updates before I abandoned mine.

Today I realized my station at Wendy's is next to the fries, the bacon, the nuggets and the condiments, and there are no cameras pointed at it

RIP my arteries

What better way to show you want to have sex than by a tasteful bundle of plant dicks in a plant ovary basket

I go to my first day of working at a job at 2:30PM.
It's 4:30AM and I'm still up

help i am incapable of breaking bad habits

Kamak wrote:This seems to lead me to believe that someone in the Gaang has loose lips. My bets are on Sokka or Katara.

Katara got drunk one night and rattled on about trying to bend the alcohol out of her blood

I was referencing Spongebob and not Big Bang Theory because Spongebob is better.

If you guys see any of the letters I send to my animals, well... I don't think you can survive the puns. I sent one to Sheldon which was just the following: "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOUR FUCKING NAME IS GODDAMN SHELDON" He showed it to me later and said it was a great letter though, probably because I p...

Awkward Zombie is 2% Exeres
That actually kinda scares me

I'll just sit here and not abuse the island like that. I'd much rather make cheddar more slowly if my alternative is grinding beetles for an hour.

The application I just filled out asked me if I was Hispanic or Latino And then in the very next question asked me what my race was There are about 100 other questions I answered that did approximately the same thing. the application boiled down to this: "Enter info so we know who you are and where ...

"Don't look at me like that"

Tim looks at him like that.

Prof. Winchester wrote:

I have to go brush my teeth 9 times

Gryewolf wrote:I'm going to google "Shaving private Ryan" and if it isn't an erotic movie about shaving then I'll be very dissapointed.

http://shavingryansprivates.tumblr.com

Lotharu wrote:How has THIS one not been posted? My favorite by far so far.

groose.jpg

Wide load