AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Ooh, ooh, I got one! Okay, you know how in Zelda Link to the Past you meet a fairy that'll grant any wish in the world for every 100 rupees you donate? And the only thing - the only thing Link wants is the magical ability to carry an arbitrary additional amount of arrows and bombs on him? I bet ther...

Generally, no part of the joke makes sense in context with any of the other parts. So it's a bad joke. And that's the joke.

Too soon?

Oh well. What's the difference between an ostrich?
Both its legs are the same length, except the right.

David Carradine's last words:
I put on my rope and wizard hat.

If Tom Cruise was a manwhore he'd be loose.

Oh wait.

What does a vegetarian zombie say?
Grrrrrraaaaaaiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnns.

Have you heard of the guy who played the horses?
His favorite was the Camptown races.

Very picturesque, Ame, but really every forum on the Inter Net is like that if you're not used to it.

Reubo runs up to you with a bounce in his step. He has open arms, and a warm smile on his face. He stops dead in front of you and closes his arms around you in a tight hug. After a few seconds, he unlocks his arms and you watch him bound away, his heart obviously warmed from performing this gesture...

Bacon wrote:Yeah, but do you really have to do 3=^__^=E ?

I can't even tell what the hell that is. Are there whiskers and... fingers?

Arms and fingers. It's a hug. Or as close as you get in a text message.

FEAR ITSELF

No, really. I've fought and killed most of my fears. All it takes is a little courage. About the only thing I'm afraid of is hurting people around me with thoughtless actions and words. Which is a pretty big issue of course. I can never get drunk, or people die.

Decker wrote:You don't want to do that.

If you have to frown at a particular set of smileys, I'm afraid you're going to have to live with a furled brow. Making oneself understood is hard enough without restricting one's vocabulary.

I'll be careful about hugging strangers though.

Sorry in advance if you've seen any of the following before. http://img299.imageshack.us/img299/3337/nicetrytl8.gif http://img392.imageshack.us/img392/8514/garfieldstu8.jpg [Removed repost] http://img224.imageshack.us/img224/4946/leastherarmorstaysonlh3.jpg http://img224.imageshack.us/img224/2127/st...

That face is not merely "good", sir! I'm overwhelmed with welcomitude.

What's up. . .playing some Diablo 2, writing stuff, eating breakfast.

Edit for below:
3=^__^=E

I do not play Magic the Gathering, but I do play Magic: the Gathering. Such fun to crawl dungeons and smite dragons. With cards.

Braingeyser + Black Vise fo' life, yo.

Edit: Thanks, I didn't even have time to look at the post and see the error. :O

Hello. I'm Invisible Queen. You may remember me from such movies as The Invisibles or Watchmen. Which would be weird because you couldn't see me in those. I like to make jokes even though people don't get them because somehow people always think I mean things I don't say. That is my curse, and my bl...