AWKWARD ZOMBIE

I was waiting in line for some random free college food thing behind some dude who was preaching at this other dude about how if he owns a restaurant, he should be allowed to let people smoke there if he wants. The guy sounded like the biggest tool while doing so. It didn't help that he had to take ...

This isn't some psychology assignment, is it? There's a very good reason as to why your team members gave themselves nearly perfect scores. In nonfancy psychology terms, it's called "People are egotistical dicks". It's the same reason people will scold you for doing some misc. action while having no...

There's this really cute chick who works at the subway that both my friend works at, and is trying to get me a job in (if that makes any sense whatsoever). According to friend, he asked her out already and said she has a boyfriend, which confused the both of us since she does say things/does stuff t...

Damnit American Flag, why must your placement on my uniform be wrong on days I go to subway where the guy who hates the ROTC is working?

Why must you regularly make me look like smashed booty?

Woah, did I miss the dick out party?

Man I miss ALL of the good dick out parties...

The biggest thing, I'd say, is that you can go 5 minutes without eating at a fast food restaurant without getting symptoms of withdrawal. Are energy drinks, fast food, junk food, or...god forbid...video games really that good for you? No, not really, but not having it doesn't cause me to walk up to ...

I've grown disinterested in girls over small (read: big) personality quirks more than I have physical looks. Yeah, I'll grow interested in a girl if she's got a nice face/figure, but a lot of the times she'll do something that is just so...stupid. What's more is how she presents herself. If all she ...

Is there an "S. Cooper" amongst the names of authors?

???

I was trying to be empathetic. You've never been so unsure of yourself on how to contact a girl that it either never happens, or happens awkwardly?

Strange...I don't feel out of the ordinary...

Must me my theory was right, I really AM always horny...

It would explain all of those and you were so eager to!

Still feeling shitty about that girl I almost went on a date with, still haven't unadded her for some reason and I keep seeing pictures of her and just argh why is this hard I've never actually met her jesus dickbutting christ EDIT: Think I'm just gonna leave her one last message saying like yo I u...

Oh my GAWD! You're like 6 years younger than him oh my GAWD!

Oh my GAWD!

GAWD!

GAWD Oh my GAWD!

Make him a bracelet...?

Well to be honest, you're both sorta right. That discussion I had in the taboo topics was, like, a small percentage of the total discussion time I've put into this specific situation. So with that, it was more tongue in cheek at the individuals I usually have this discussion with than anything. I wa...

I just wear my giant dick costume. I'm always swimming in bitches by the end of the night.