AWKWARD ZOMBIE

I just looked that up thinking it was just one of the "level up" helmets, but apparently it's the assassination helmet. That's actually a pretty big deal. I define a good match when I get just one assassination, really good when I get an assassination plus a handful of vehicle kills (and then the on...

Just note that any stress you feel over the idea of asking a guy out is the exact same stress a guy is feeling over asking a girl out. It's why it's actually welcomed when a girl makes the first move, especially since it's so unexpected given how sexually stratified the trends are. Any guy who would...

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OK so it isn't just you guys...what the hell is that thing seriously?

And here I thought it was everyone's subconscious dream to become booty shorts, Gods/Goddesses included.

I can't go on dates because when I do, I get nervous, and when I get nervous, I get overly hilarious. I'm not usually overly hilarious, only slightly hilarious.

I want the Infiltrator helmet, but the requirement is RIDICULOUS. The Enforcer one I saw because I noticed I was dangerously close to turret gunner mastery, and it looked badass enough to tide it over. Plus I'm already almost level 4 on multikill mastery. I realize when I get to level 7, it'll take ...

Woah, dude, at least go on a date before you go out collecting her v-card......

Ridiculous Ochem test tomorrow. I got about 50% of it no problem, but the other 50% is Sn1/Sn2/E1/E2 stuff which she taught all funky. Instead of teaching it like "This is an Sn2 rxn. Things that identify an Sn1 but not the other three are *BLAH BLAH BLAH*" and then doing that for all 4 of them, she...

Just got the perfectionist achievement in Assassins Creed 3. OOOOOHHHHHHHH my god I've never been more relieved to receive an achievement. It was a COLOSSAL pain in the booty on way more than just one occasion. My roommate's also relieved, but that's more because now I'm going to stop yelling at the...

Really? I always saw Kaiden as bodaciously the only member of the crew who didn't get all up in your face with his problems, even when you did ask about them. Kaiden: "Tell me about the biotic internment camp." "They rounded us up, took us away from our family, and prodded at us to learn how we tick...

That's adorable as hell. I can't help but think, however, that that would be the perfect set up for a sitcom episode where the entire premise is "guy doesn't pay attention to relationship stuff." "I've hidden your present somewhere in the city. Follow the clues to find it. Your first clue is where w...

Except this time, it's based on the shit you do in the game, and not just the amount of shit you do in the game.

I only have 150 turret kills until I get my super special awesome helmet.

I have never been this excited over something so seemingly insignificant before.

I wonder how they would handle themselves if a real emergency happened.

*hurricane Sandy*

Oh right, they just wouldn't care. I love you America!

Stupid question: Is that a way of saying you threw up?

Hopefully it's not because the thing gave you some kind of bug. I would brush my teeth and maybe down some Pepto.
And then hope I don't get that black mouth thing that was discussed earlier.