The Adventures of Crystal - A Pokemon Crystal Let's Play

[Exeres]

You are a man of few words, aren't you?

[[Citation Needed]]

I have this whole next update written up (it is exactly 15 pages long in Word, if anyone cares), just waiting on Chloe.

She should have the arts done sometime tomorrow.

Well, today. 4:18 AM now.

Sorry about no update yesterday.


Do me a favor and not post any more in the thread until I get the update posted. I don't want to have to wait for another page.

[[Citation Needed]]

HEY GUYS HERE IT IS BLAME CHLOE FOR LATENESS
BUT HER ART IS GOOD.
:>

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

NOW, TEAM! SLEEP IS FOR LOSERS!

ARE WE LOSERS?

NO WE AREN'T!

BACK OUT INTO VIOLET. WE SHALL NOT REST UNTIL LANCE IS TAKEN DOWN.

Oh, wait, what is this?


Pokemon Academy? Maybe I can make up for skipping Pokemon Trainer classes!



That was stupid.



Sheesh, you sure cheated your friend.



Nifty! I shall remember that and make everyone hold pimple fruit!



WHOA SLOW DOWN THIS IS TOO MUCH


Hah. Learn to write faster.



You should later rub your notes in the face of the guy behind you.



You'd better, or you'll get an A FOR ABOMINABLE.




Hmmmm... I could use this information. WHAT DO YOU SAY, TEAM? WE MUST LEARN!






Alright done studying now where the hell is the teacher. I guess I have to go find him...


Oh this building looks useful. It has "GYM" on it! THIS MUST BE THE FIRST TEST ON THE ROAD TO ORANGE JUICE.


But wait! There is a green fat man over there!


...yes, I are trainer.


No.


I've been! I'm TRYING to find the teacher! I think his name is Earl.


You'd better not be some creep.



Why do you spin every four steps.


Hey this is the school.



Wow! You am Earl, I take it?


Wha? Are you still standing out there? Isn't it cold?


Yeah. Also I have caller ID.



RATTATA IS KNIVES



Meanie.



Wait... Your Rattata took down a Spinark? Those things are fierce. Your Rattata must be...








Oh my god, I never want to see this Rattata again. Hold me, Boris.



Alright enough hugging let's go bug the fat man.


EARL, MY FOREIGN MAN.


Yes. Excellent minions.
I AM READY FOR MY TEST.




...




...



...


I AM VICTORIOUS!


Stoner failed.


I AM NOW READY TO FACE THE WORLD!

WORLD = GYM



Mom always said I should find a boyfriend.



Looks pretty bland from the outside. Must've been rough, mud-based structure when his dad ran it.

But it looks like there is other stuff this way! Falkner can wait!


Wiggly tree? Do they usually wiggle?



That's... Really weird. I don't think they are supposed to do that.


Damn, woman.



Sheesh. What's she on?


STUPID PIDGEY
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU SPELL YOUR NAME


Gotta go check out this mad, crazy dancing wiggle tree.


Hi, sign!



I heard!
Where is "Goldenrod", anyway?


HORRORS


You do something. Get an ax or something.


AUGH, ENTHUSIASM! IT BURNS!




What kind of dumbass punches a tree. I mean, it's not like we're in a world of blocks or something silly like that.


You failed at being able to punch something?


ALRIGHT, TREE
IT'S ON.

...

Well? Aren't you going to-


Oh my god.


OH MY GOD





MY MIND = BLOWN

I guess I should get back to Violet. But there is some grass here! I'll catch some minions with my NEWLY LEARNT TRAINER SKILLS!


Goddammit.


They do have a use, though.


You barely even have a face.


OH
MY
GOD



IT REMINDS ME OF JOHN LENNON FOR SOME REASON!


CATCH ME THAT LENNONSPROUT.


Eeeeeeexcellent.



Did John Lennon have vines?

Hmmmm... I'll call you...

OJ Minion #4
Designation: Wikileek


Ohmygodaghostthisissoawesome.


But wait! Pouncer only knows Normal-type attacks, those have no effect on Ghost-type Pokemon! Thank you, Mr. Earl!

BORIS! POISON STI-
That lasted long. Nice job only hitting him like three times.

BACK TO POUNCER.

COMMENCE THROWING OF CAPTURE SPHERES






That's awesome.



No! Bad... What shall I call you? Don't lick anyone unless I say so!


I think I'll call you...

OJ Minion #5
Designation: Geist

And since everyone is practically dead now...

WHAT ARE YOU, MY MOTHER


I have heard this several times already.




Yes. Why else do people come here? Everyone in this world seems to eat, breathe, sleep, and relieve themselves in the same limited walking space and they never go anywhere else.


NEEEEEEEVVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEER


TO THE SPROUT TOWER


This place looks stupid. What's with the Bellsprout statues? They aren't that great. No offense, Wiki.


Holy shit.



Okay wow, really?
Is everyone here stupid or something?
If there was a 100-foot-talll anything mobile coming towards you you'd throw flaming things at it and run screaming, not build a tower around it. It's just a center column.


Yes. It is a bit unnerving.


If battles do that to this building, then it can't be structurally sound.


Around the body of a screaming, burning, imprisoned Bellsprout or something.


I don't think the builders intended that or the tower wouldn't be swaying so much. Seriously. I'm starting to get motion sickness and we're on the ground floor.



That was in Mr. Earl's notes!
HMs, or Hidden Machines, teach special moves that can be taught multiple times without the HM breaking!
Also apparently you need badges to be certified to use HM moves outside of battle, so they must be REALLY awesome!


HM here I come! I wonder if it'll be Surf or Strength or-


IIIIITEEEEMMM!
CURSE YOU, WALL.
FOILED AGAIN.



I think you trust the tower too much.


YOU'RE SHAVED
AHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
You have Ninth Doctor hair!


A Bellsprout, eh? Only fitting considering the name Sprout Tower and your idiotic beliefs that the center pillar was once alive.


Easy wins for Boris.



Good lord another one?
Destroy it, Boris.


Yeah. Asshat would probably curbstomp you for being weak.



The hell is a parlyz?
MR. EARL, YOU DID NOT TEACH ME EVERYTHING!


Lamest job ever.



I hear the PokeMart is hiring. You could get a job there.


Wow. Your name is lamer than your job. Three opponents, though? THIS WILL BE A TOUGH BATTLE!



MORE Bellsprout? Sheesh! Do you guys train anything else? Stoner, you are useless. Go smoke a joint or something.


You aren't smoking it right.


POISON HUG IT TO DEATH
ENGULF IT WITH YOUR BODY


Or put it to sleep and lick it to death.
That works, too.


Mwahahaha-


Oh hey, level up!
Back to your previously scheduled laugh.
Mwahahahahahaha-


YOU GUYS REALLY LIKE THE BELLSPROUTS, DON'T YOU?


Geist likes them, too.


GODDAMMIT WILL YOU STOP USING THOSE?





...what for?


AHA, I HAVE REACHED THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WALL!


VICTORY IS MINE!
But Mr. Earl said these were pretty much useless, so I'll just sell it later.


ohmygodnoway


...
...
It's a Bellsprout.

HEY, OLD MAN!
Do you know what's so great about Bellspr-


That's a stupid reason, but-


Well! I like what you've done with the lights! I almost like this place n-


Goddammit you keep interrupting me.


Another Bellsprout.
WIKILEEK VS. UNNAMED PITCHER PLANT
FIGHT



Several turns later...

Forget this.



It passed out upon seeing Pouncer's blood-stained maw. And it is a plant. Why would that bother it.
Maybe it's squeamish.


POUNCER YOU ARE SO GREAT! Another level up! We'll reach League tier in no time!

TWO MORE BELLSPROUT LATER...

Eeeeheeehehehehehehe.






Try Lanturn for best results!


I think this is the opposite of what you wanted.


Oh my god this Bellsprout is stronger than ANY BEFORE.
Things must be getting SERIOUS.

(Skipping the next battle or so, because they take up too much space and the trainers say nothing interesting.)



Well, I know not to trust Wikileek with any secrets. Pouncer will attempt to devour everything that moves if he isn't fed on time, Geist is too crazy to be reliable, and Stoner is a stoner.
Boris is awesome, though.



Holy-!
IT ISN'T A BELLSPROUT!
PARTY!



I am victorious over these old men with shining foreheads. I am ready to face the elder!


HEY IT'S ASSHAT!
HEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYY, ASSHAT! I hear the police are looking for y-


What are you doing?
Staring contest?



Looks intense. I'll just take the HM and leave you two alone, then.


Hah! You lost!



Everything is weak to you.



Have you tried punching trees lately?


What does.



I dunno... Boris is pretty sweet.



What good is a team of losers, anyway?



Perhaps you should care about me, then, since I did destroy you in battle last time we met.


He vanished.
Clearly Escape Ropes are teleportation devices.


How convenient!



I hope that means the painting is powerful, because Bellsprout aren't.

...

Wikileek, is that my diary?


Hey since you just had all your Pokemon smashed and torn to pieces by that fiendish gingerman, can I just have the HM?


WHAT?
FLASH? I FIGHT MY WAY THROUGH WHAT FELT LIKE THOUSANDS OF BELLSPROUT FOR FLASH?



Thanks for nothing, old man! This thing has practically no use-



The League even limits its uselessness.


I'M OUT OF HERE.



Augh! What is wrong with the lights?!


Goddammit! I'm not supposed to walk on doors!
Those Bellsprout exhausted my team.
We must heal, then destroy League Slave #1: Falkner!


AND SO...



TO THE GYM!


Silly door! Nothing will stand in my way! NOT EVEN... DOORS!


ANOTHER VICTORY FOR THE CRYSTAL SQUAD.



Hurry it up, then. I was about to elbow you in the face and throw you into that abyss back there.


...nd with a tiiiiiiiiny pinch of magic, all my dreams will come true?


Something like that. Victorious orange juice dream involving kicking Lance in the nads.


Make me.



The only Grass-type I even have is Wikileek.
And he's too busy divulging secrets to be too useful in battle, anyway.


First gym challenge! Are you excited, team?
Yeah, me too!

[Komodoensis]

Assdgsdfghsdfg I need to get my pic uploaded and then have Chloe make a better version of it because I am ashamed at my artwork.
:<

[[Citation Needed]]

Do you guys like how I avoided showing the battle with the elder.



Yeah.

It makes sense. If his whole team got wiped out by Asshat, then he wouldn't be able to battle me four seconds later.

[Ablu2]

Win. And dont you know everyone has an unlimited supply of max revives except you?

[Verom]

Pouncer will surely cause the end of days once he evolves

[[Citation Needed]]

Win. And dont you know everyone has an unlimited supply of max revives except you?

NO THEY DON'T
The most items any NPC can have is 4, I think.

Pouncer will surely cause the end of days once he evolves

The tiny alligator that eats birds.


To the giant alligator with claws, opposable thumbs, and jaws big enough to eat people.

[Explotaro]

I think he meant how you could fight the monk RIGHT AFTER HE LOST.

How else would they have been at full health.

[Nancymaker]

Hoping this doesn't die! Been really enjoying reading it. Do you plan on continuing the adventure through Kanto as well, or finishing at the Indigo Plateau (Orange Juice Stall)?

[[Citation Needed]]

Hoping this doesn't die! Been really enjoying reading it. Do you plan on continuing the adventure through Kanto as well, or finishing at the Indigo Plateau (Orange Juice Stall)?

I dunno, to be honest. Whether or not it continues to Kanto depends on how I feel when I finish at the Indigo Plateau.

I will keep updating so long as people keep posting and we get to more pages. One update per page.

[Nancymaker]

Shameless push-for-new-page then!

I vote that you get a Houndour at the earliest oppurtunity and name it 'Core Hound'.

[Boredom]

More shameless page-bumping!

[Explotaro]

BUMP

Lesse after the next post, we can go to page......the next

[Ablu2]

Bumpity bump bump.