AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Soul Tired of These:
Dovahkaatiie defeats several dragons. Consumes souls. Sighs. Puts on Chef Hat and goes after more dragons. Tries doing something different with souls. Adds sauce. Maybe deepfries them.

How about this: Wind Waker Link is shown in one panel doing one of the Wand spells. The second panel shows nearby islands being devastaed by typhoons and tsunamis brought about by Link screwing up the planets climate by changing it to fit his wind usage.

TheStranger wrote:How about this: Wind Waker Link is shown in one panel doing one of the Wand spells. The second panel shows nearby islands being devastaed by typhoons and tsunamis brought about by Link screwing up the planets climate by changing it to fit his wind usage.

She already did that.

Crap, knew it was too good to not have been done. Gonna have to archive binge before suggesting another one

Study yo zombie fo you enter my domain, fool.

Picori size jokes go.

Out of Sight, Out of Hearts:
Minish cap happens way back in Hyrule's history and they never show up again. How often have they been stepped on? I'm imagining the various incarnations of the Heroes going forth to vanquish evil with the Picori originally cheering them on. As time passes, the Picori simply become more concerned with avoiding boots. Link wonders what that squeaking sound he hears all the time is.

Lighten Up:
Simpler joke. Link gets shrunk down for the first time and meets the Picori. He trips and some items fall out of his bag. Including the Magnifying Lens. Picori hide their children from the monstrous Light Bringer.

Hats Off/Gulliver's Travesties:
Link shrinks down and enters Picori village. Ezlo gets knocked off his head. Link expands rapidly.

Man...I didn't realize you could catch the Bomb Fish...is it too late to suggest a sequel where he throws one on the grill?

Another Skyrim comic. Also, it occurs to me that I should 'pretty up' my submissions.

Fiscal Interest

[Panel 1] *Katie's mage is standing inside an alchemist's shop near the counter, about to interact with the merchant who looks very unamused. The merchant must be male for the joke to work.*

[Panel 2] *Change focus to a shelf of rare ingredients such as Daedra hearts, void salts, pearls, etc, all with price tags on the displays ranging from 400 to 800 septims.* Katie: "daisies, that stuff's pretty expensive... Better use my haggling gear."

[Panel 3-1 & 3-2] *Katie's mage then proceeds to strip her clothing down to the underwearr (preferably a shot of the rear-end as pants are removed) right there in the store in front of the merchant. I have confidence that Katie can pull this off (giggity) with a straight face.* / *Katie redresses in different clothing with subtitles indicating their valuable bartering enchantments like Amulet of Dibella for +15 Speechcraft (and sex appeal) or a gold diamond ring that improves selling and buying prices by 20%. Possibly include a potion of haggling being drunk that dribbles down the mage's front for a wet shirt effect.*

[Panel 4] *Cut back to the merchant in a shot slightly panned to his right, showing the second zero scribbled out of every price tag reducing all ingredients to a value under 100 septims. His expression is unchanged other than perhaps wider eyes, a faint or strong blush, or a bleeding nose; emphasis on only ONE facial effect being used.* Katie: "Wow, I'm gettin' pretty good at this trading stuff!"

I've always been curious whether or not your public change of wardrobe for whatever bonus effect (extrat stats, increase inventory space, whatever) is noticed in-universe and the developers forgot that packet of dialogue options. I also wonder if it ever effected how big a discount you get if your female character chooses to change into that bartering gear right in front of the person you're about to trade with. Personally, I think any woman brave enough to strip down and put on a whole new ensemble in my store for the sake of better haggling deserves a freebie. Then again, maybe I'm just a perv.

Hamstern Warning:
Ball rolls by several Space Pirates.
"THE HUNTER!!"
Space Pirates unload weapons at sphere.
"I think we got her."
Other Space Pirate walks in.
"You guys seen my hamster?"

Spider Vain:
Link hears scritching sound. Looks around and sees Skulltula. Kills it.
"So that's what that noise is. I've been hearing...it...everywhere..." Link goes pale.
Last panel has Link shake under blankets as night falls and the sound of Skulltulas fills the night.

Great Responsibility:
Link battles and reaches for various masks. Accidentally grabs Skulltula token left in bag from last adventure. Turns into Spider Link. Maybe a weapon in each of eight hands. Maybe unrelenting horror.

Close Combat Specialist (Not negotiator)

An XCOM squad makes it to the final boss, who I shall not describe for those who have not beat the game. It starts to make a speech about how it had the regrettable task of testing the people of Earth's worthiness to join the galactic community, but humanity's ingenuity has more than proven it's worth. However, as it's doing this it's also walking towards the squad's assault specialist.

*Lok 'Crusher' Deng takes a reaction shot!*

I wasn't aware you had played the Minish Cap. In that case, here's one I have had for years that comes from Oracle of Ages.

MAKU TREE (PAST): *As Link is walking away* "Link...um...when you grow up...I'm gonna marry you! Ah, there I said it!"
*Link makes a face, then turns to face the Maku Tree, pulls out his sword, and walks up to her until he is practically in her face and then points the sword at her*
LINK: "WHAT did you just say!?" *Pokes Maku Tree with sword* "I don't EVER want to hear you say that AGAIN. GOT IT!? I mean, you're a TREE and I'm a HUMAN BEING. It doesn't even work!" *begins leaving area, then turns and walks backwards while glaring at her* "I'm WATCHING you..."

-In the present day-
MAKU TREE: "Remember Link? You said that when you returned, you would marry me!"
*Link makes disgusted face at her while mentally telling himself not to burn her with Ember Seeds later*

Feel free to adjust this any way you like if you choose to go with this idea! I would love to see one of my ideas be displayed to the world! And if you care about getting more fans at all, I would have no problem with announcing this comic to friends, family, and the many fans of my own that I have out there!

Keratin & Kerosene:
Katie battles Magmar with Piloswine. Piloswine gets hit with Flamethrower.
KATIE: "Oh, God..."
Trainer Katie winces and fans hand in front of her face.
"...burnt hair."

Helping Back Hand:
Katie puts two Pokemon into the Daycare. Talks to Daycare guy.
"Your Pokemon don't seem to like each other..." Katie gives glare to her Pokemon who are standing apart. Old Man turns to look at them. Katie brings out whip. Both Pokemon put on fake smiles and embrace.
"Wow...they sure get along well..."

Softball:
Trainer Katie knocks out foe with Gengar. Gengar looks a little worn out.
"Hey, Chansey, Softboiled!!"
Chansey tosses egg to Gengar, egg splats on ground.

Take Care:
Trainer Katie sends Ditto into battle in arena/gym/etc. Ditto immediately turns into opposite gender version of opponent and seduces enemy.
KATIE: "Eww, Ditto, stop that, this isn't the Daycare!!"
Katie covers her face in shame. Looks up. Calls over to other horrified trainer.
KATIE: "The egg is mine!"

Fatal Attraction:
Trainers Norrin and Katie arrive at the Daycare to pick up the Pokemon.
Old Man: "Your Pokemon don't seem to like each other. But look what I found."
Hands over egg. Katie and Norrin are ecstatic.
KATIE: "A baby?"
NORRIN: "Eww, they had sex?"
KATIE: "Eww, they had angry sex?"

Egg Silent/Ground Eggs:
Trainer Katie is riding bike, pulling a wagon with five eggs, going in circles. Another Trainer approaches her.
"Wanna battle?"
"No." Continues in circles. Other trainer might push the issue at which point Katie's Blastoise Hydro Pumps them out of the way.

Insider Trading:
Trainer Katie trades Machoke, Haunter, etc. to another Trainer. At other end of the link is Trainer Katie wearing a fake mustache. Mustached Katie looks down at Pokemon.
"Now freaking evolve."
Other possible executions involve Trainer Katie secretly taking someone else's Pokemon and then switching it back to trigger the evolution.

Oh Skyrim. An explanation for these: as a thief, I f*ckin' love stealing stuff and replacing it with something stupid, especially when it's pickpocketing. Gold necklace? Replace it with a dagger. Then wait a while, go back for the dagger, and replace it with a spoon. The best part is imagining their reactions when they realize that not only is someone screwing with their inventory unnoticed, being aware of the problem doesn't stop the offender from coming back and doing it again.

Pocket Stalkers

[Panel 1] *A Markarth city guard is standing around inthe Understone(?) Keep with his back to a relatively dark nook. There's a small, round object in the pouch on his hip. His helmet neatly mirrors his disdainful scowl underneath.* Guard: "This new no-eating-on-patrol policy is bullsh*t. First I can't worship Talos, now I can't eat my apple. It's in my f*cking pocket."
[Panel 2] *The guard gets a surprised expression and stumbles as his pouch changes shape from small and round to huge and a nonsensical shape.* Guard: "HOO!!!"
[Panel 3] *The guard investigates his pockets and finds his apple has been replaced by a wooden bowl, a Dwemer gear, and an unfamiliar dagger caked in blood. His look is of utter confusion bordering hysteria.* Guard: "Th'f*ck?! This isn't mine! Where'd my apple go?!"
[Panels 4-1 & 4-2] *The guard shudders originating from his hip as a hand withdraws from his pouch offscreen.* / *Checking again, the guard finds that his inventory has been changed again by an added letter.*
[Panel 5] *The letter bears an ink handprint with 'We Know' written underneath.*
[Panel 6] *The guard is beginning to panic, giving Katie the chance to plant a human heart into his pouch from behind a planter with an apple in her mouth.*

Pack Skeever

[Panel 1] *A guard and his employing wizard are standing in a bedroom with diaplay cases on either side of the bed. The guard is looking in one whil the wizard sits on the bed.* Wizard: "I don't believe this! Mint condition copies of every text in Tamriel history on the Dwemer people, thousands of septims and months of searching! Stolen! What do I pay you idiots for?!" Guard: "It's not all bad, sir. The thief left you a consolation prize."
[Panel 2] *The wizard is shocked.* Wizard: "What?! You mean they didn't just take my books, they left something? What'd they leave?" *The guard is holding up a fancy cap.* Guard: "A hat. It's pretty nice."
[Panel 3] *Looking across the room at another guard going through the opposite case, the wizard scratches the back of his head.* Wizard: "I don't.... I don't get it, but it kinda diffuses my anger... you there! Did the thief leave something in there as well?"
[Panel 4] *The second guard is fishing around in the case while the wizard and first guard stand beside each other looking at him/her.* Guard 2: "It's either a piece of eidar cheese, or really nasty underdrawers." *Katie can be seen hiding under the bed, one hand fishing through the wizard's pocket and the other hand is poised to replace the stolen object with a [insert random object here].*

HEY OMNI, REMEMBER WHEN WE MADE THOSE BIOSHOCK COMIC IDEAS?

Organic flaw
Jack equips the Winter Blast plasmid in a hot area, his hand begins melting.

Yeah, vaguely...

Bee Have:
Jackatie uses Bee Plasmid. Then switches rapidly to fire. Bees fall off of hand on fire.
KATIE: "Oops, sorry little guys." Switches to ice. Bees freeze and fall over. Switches to electricity, fries bees. Finally uses up Eve, in time to leave ground covered in dead bees.

Bee Bee Gun:
Katie switches rapidly between Hive and Fire. Throws flaming bees at enemies.

Bees to the Flame:
Katie shoots bees at enemies. Activates Lightning Plasmid. Unintentionally attracts insects right back to her hand.

Supply Drop:
Master Chief battles the bad guys. Suddenly grabs stomach.
CORTANA: "Chief?"
CHIEF: "Guess I unthawed finally. Do you think the Forerunners have bathrooms?"
Cortana points at strange symbols floating over door. Chief runs over to bathroom, opens stall. Sees the toilet dispenser is out of paper. Grabs high tech roll. Looks at dispenser for a moment. Presses button. Dispenser flies apart in elaborate sequence and loads TP cartridge. Ejects glowing orange hardlight paper.
CHIEF: "Yeah, I think I can hold it."

Ro Sham D'oh:
Kirby turns into stone and falls upon sword wielding Brawler.
KIRBY: "Rock beats scissors."
Pit hits Kirby with Fan.
PIT: "Ha, paper beats rock."
MARTH: "Scissors beats paper." Cuts off Pit's hand holding the fan.
Other Brawlers look at Marth in shock.
MARTH: "Oh, it's not funny when I do it."

In retrospect it's a real pity Roy isn't part of the cast anymore. I could've call it Roy Sham D'oh.

Been-a-dick

Trainer Katie walks by the Day-Care center when the Day-C man walks up and hold out an egg, saying how surprised he was to have found it. Cut to angry chaney in the paddock.

Add a snickering thief-y pokemon for added humor.

So Tiled:
Link fends off flying floor tiles. Walks out of room. Moblins enter and painstakingly retile the floor, replace the pots, and open cages letting out more monsters. Link re-enters the room.
LINK: "Damn!" Begins fighting off monsters and tiles. Leaves again. Moblins re-enter room.
MOBLIN: "Damn!" Start rebuilding room again.