TMI & NSFW Thread: Augmented Edition (Heavily Moderated)

[Reyo]

Brace for impact from proletariats in...

I don't think they have the spines to go against our punning capabilities.

[Kamak]

If they don't before this, they will when they rip them out of us.

Then we'll need some kind of contraption to help hold us up... but what?

[Reyo]

Perhaps some sort of belt that would wrap around your body that could sustain both its weight and your own, preventing any sort of dangerous motion of your dorsal region...

[Exeres]

Do you mean a spinal reinforcer?

[Kamak]

There it is!

[Nachalnik]

my jaw jerked without warning again and it hurt so bad it brought tears to my eyes

my mom it was all my fault because i haven't done any jaw exercises recently and just walked off leaving me by myself

i think i'm seeing why she didn't become a nurse....

[Cynical Slob]

you need a jaw brace

[Nachalnik]

i was meant to get my jaw wired shut or something but it got put off because i was young at the time

i might have to look into that option again maybe

because i refuse to believe my jaw is going to get better from simple exercises

[Game Angel]

I think I applied too much vagisil
i think the skin is numb

this is the weirdest most uncomfortable feeling ever :'(

[Madican]

Try numbing your eyes. It feels much weirder.

[Game Angel]

gah nooo feeling numb anywhere is fuckin weird and I hate it

Especially since it's so easy to equate with being sick
(obviously not in this case, of course)

[Tetrunes]

I found out I have low blood pressure. I am the worst American

[Valbrandur]

Was cutting out the guts of fishes today, worst thing I've ever done.

At least I learned that this fish species eats sea shells and that fishermen like to leave their hooks in the fishes.

[Galaxy Man]

okay i have learned things

first learned thing: when you a sick, force yourself to eat, because otherwise you'll wake up suddenly three days later with the largest need for food you will hopefully ever have, but still be too sick to eat very many things.

second learned thing: the flu makes me unbearably horny without the breath, strength, or erection to actually jerk off

this is not a fun experience i am having and i hope you all can learn from these "true facts"

[YCobb]

Begin to fap, get text from mom.

What timing.