The Dating Stories/Progress thread

[luroberto]

Stay away from the vaginae.

[SaintCrazy]

Girls scare me, and I am one.

[Kergan]

Kamak : what do you call "young" ?

The girl I'm currently interested in is the first girl to ever give me my attention back, the first to hug me and facebattle me. I've waited 18 years for that, but boy is it worth it !

[Rinoko]

18 is fine, you're an adult now.

I think he means that you shouldn't commit to a "serious relationship" when you're young, like around high-school age or younger, because hormones and such. And I agree with him. You young whippersnappers tend to get really excited by the prospect of having a significant other and want to drop the L word way too quickly. I'm not saying that's always the case, but it's often the case. And I'm not putting myself above anyone else, either. I remember being in high school and telling two of the girls I was dating that I loved them. Both times their reaction was akin to "Oh...umm...that's nice....."

[Kamak]

Kamak : what do you call "young" ?

The girl I'm currently interested in is the first girl to ever give me my attention back, the first to hug me and facebattle me. I've waited 18 years for that, but boy is it worth it !

Yeah, 18 is mostly fine, and it differs for people, but like, this relationship of mine happened junior year of high school.

I wasn't even driving at that point and EVA-01 wanted to fly across the country and live in my room after 3 weeks of "dating".

This is the kinda stuff people get into with online dating too early, and hell, despite how stupid it was of me, I got off lightly compared to the shit other people get into when they share personal information and stuff.

And just yeah, despite feeling like I knew everything about relationships back then after seeing a bunch of stupid stuff with friends and family, the biggest thing I learned from my relationship is that until you're in one, you really don't know what it means to be in one. Expectations change, there's lots to compromise on, and getting to know another person on a more personal level can and often will change how you feel about them.

[Riku]

HEY
HEY
Sloth and I started dating at the beginning of our Junior year of high school, and with any luck, we'll be able to get married next year.
And my previous (and first) boyfriend and I dated for two years before that. and Sloth and I are both still good friends with him.

So, while it almost never happens, there are exceptions.

[Rinoko]

Your first boyfriend had the raddest beard.

[Kamak]

HEY
HEY
Sloth and I started dating at the beginning of our Junior year of high school, and with any luck, we'll be able to get married next year.
And my previous (and first) boyfriend and I dated for two years before that. and Sloth and I are both still good friends with him.

So, while it almost never happens, there are exceptions.

Hence why I said it differs for people, but generally 18... MAYBE 16 is the lowest age people should consider a relationship to be serious, and even then, don't have high expectations that something will come out of it.

I also know people who dated in high school and got married shortly after because "true love".

They've found living together after getting married to be a lot more jarring than they expected.

Probably best to do that before tying the knot.

[The Willow Witch]

I've known a lot of people to break up because they couldn't stand living and being around each other 24/7

I think its a really big make or break to an actual relationship, and most of the time not actually needed.

[Vax]

Well there are middle-grounds between purely online long distance relationships, and living together.

Like me and Sailor Moon for example. We live separately, yet we see each other almost every day and usually sleep together (unless one of us has work or stuff to do early the next day or something), but it used to be that we hung out every other day or so, talked alot over the phone/on the internet, and rarely had sleepovers or anything.

So basically I think it's important to have a little bit of a curve. Ease into each level of the relationship naturally and you'll discover what you are and are not comfortable with more easily.

[Kergan]

That's one thing I'm worried about : If me and this girl end up dating, I fear we may be incompatible in this point of view : I'm the kind of guy that want to see the girl he loves every single day, and I'm not sure she won't feel oppressed.

Aside from that, I'm becoming paranoïd. I fear every word she says has a hidden meaning, I can't stop being afraid that it won't work out, that she'll change her mind, that she'll see me for what I really am.
I spend most of my nights asking myself questions.

[Dire]

Well the only thing that fixes a problem like that is self confidence.

If you think you're no good and then try and hide who you are then you're practically lying to the girl.
If you really are a no good person then the respectable thing to do is become a better person.

If you're a good person, then you should feel good about yourself and have confidence that you are likeable and worth the distance.

[Kergan]

Yeah, that's the one thing I always lacked in my relations with girls, self-confidence. It has been holding me back for a loooong time.
(Which is ... kind of strange, considering I am too confident in everything else.)

[The Willow Witch]

I think its safe to say that its better the fix those sort of problems before you pursue any sort of romantic relationship.

[Kergan]

Yeah, except the best way of solving this problem is by having the girl I love complimenting me ><