AWKWARD ZOMBIE

The guy is willing to have two people in his life where he consistently lies about the nature of their relationship...and even if it was only you, and the other girl was in on it, that just makes it worse.

Natch, I realize you guys were close at one point, and that you want to stay friends, but given how he treated you I can't for the life of me understand how you can believe anything he's said up until this point. People have the most surprising capacity to be shit, even if you don't believe it. Even if he wasn't such a dick before, something obviously changed in his life that made him think it's OK to lie to people in the fashion he lied to you.

To put it simply: This guy is NOT worth an ounce of your time.

Nachalnik wrote:I said I was sorry though! And I said I was sorry for a bunch of other things as well.

I'm want to be friends just like how he wants to be friends.

I really can't see where this is going wrong.

How can you not see?

He's got another woman, regardless of whether she's in on it, do you really think he's gonna have time for you any more? He likely ended it so he wouldn't have to divide his time any more.

Things will never be what they used to be, and what they used to be was a lie.

Trying to stay in touch with this guy is like keeping a knife in your side, then twisting it. You won't being the healing process if you refuse to let go of what hurt you.

Nacha, we know you better than you might think. You get anxious and when you do you dwell on a single thought process and eventually follow through with it regardless of how bad of an idea it actually was. When I suggested taking a break from the computer, it was to help you take your mind off of your ex. The longer you sit in front of the screen, the more likely you are to think about the "what ifs" without judging how likely these things are to happen. The computer break is still a thing that might help you clear your mind a bit and think about the situation rationally. Take a week off and read some books or go outside and do something different with your time. Just don't overthink what your options are with your ex. If you are asking yourself too many "what if" questions or find yourself trying to justify what he did, then you need to realise that it's the anxiety talking and it might be time to take a step back and give yourself time to calm down.

I'll also take this time to bring up the previous advice I had in picking up some kind of hobby to keep you distracted, and get yourself busy, which will eventually make you happier.

And alternatively, if you don't want to take a break from the computer, at the very least, stop going on places where he might be. Block him on communication channels, stop going on Skype, whatever you need to put distance between you, and if you realize you're going someplace and that you don't trust yourself to stay away, don't go to that place, or walk away from the computer and go do something else.

Do not communicate with him, and do not forgive him. If you validate his actions without him going through the necessary steps to get your forgiveness, you're reinforcing the idea that he can get away with this. Maybe he'll try starting shit with you again, and this time, he won't have to worry about hurting you and driving you away, because you forgave him the first time. Or maybe, he'll get a third girl in on this, maybe someone he feels he can manipulate.

You can't be soft on people like him. If he feels he can get off scot free, he could do it to you or someone else again, and that shouldn't be allowed to happen, ever.

Sooooo there's a girl at my church that I'm interested in. I'm not really anywhere near ready to ask her out or anything, but something's bothering me a tad. We've been doing a lot of fun things lately with our mutual friends(we went swing dancing last week, Easter egg hunt today, etc.), and it's been a blast, but we haven't really spent a whole ton of time together in a serious environment, and when we do these fun things I tend to get kind of animated because I'm having a good time, which makes me wonder if she won't be able to take me seriously should anything happen between us.

Ask her to go to a restaurant with you.
Or to a non-comedy based movie.
Or to a church event not based around recreation.

Most reasonable people understand that people have different dimensions to them other than what they usually see. The more you get to know each other, the more rounded you become in each other's eyes.

Get tired of the girl when she's spherical. I wanna girl with some edges, maybe some geodesic folds.

At some point I guess I'll learn not to go afte people who have rejected me, but only when the universe stops encouraging me to keep trying.

She rejected me at first because she didnt feel the right ways about me. The next time, it was because she wasn't up to a long distance relationship. On Friday, she wanted a relationship just as badly as I did.
Now I've just got to save for a trip to England so I can give her the first facebattle she's embarrassed to care so much about.

She's so precious I'd be using dumb anime faces if this wasn't a fairly serious forum.

I'd want to see said dumb anime faces. Hooray for you, YCobb!

Oh, and today Noff and I watched Emperor's New Groove. It wasn't really planned, more like he just chose the movie because of funny Tumblr gifs. Which I'm fine with. Just doing stuff together is enough for me. I have sort of realized that it's not about the day that makes it special, so much as it's special how long we've lasted, I guess I forgot that for a little.

*Assumes there are no homophobes in this thread*

SO

I finally got around to friending someone I play a lot of TF2 with, and to my surprise he immediately started telling me about himself. First and foremost: he was gay.

I never really had a problem with gay people (in fact, I had actually been a bit bi-curious), but I had never actually talked with one before, so this was a whole new experience for me. I told him I was straight, but didn't mind gays at all, and he seemed content with that.

We talked a little more, played a little more, then eventually I went to bed, and that seemed to be the end of it. The next morning, however, he messaged me a "good morning" on Steam. I had enjoyed talking with him the previous night, and I felt the need to talk to him again. Pretty much the whole day yesterday (I think I should have mentioned it was yesterday) was spent on the computer with Steam open in the background. I found out we have a lot of similarities: We both like Pokemon, we both listen to electronic/techno music (specifically Renard Queenston), and we're both German, to name a few.

A bit later into the day, he says this exact thing to me: "You know, for a heterosexual, you're pretty gay.
I like that. :3"
(FYI: Some roleplaying had been had; plus, I play on a upstanding member of society server, so some ear-nomming (something I happen to do a lot of in-game thanks to server plugins) was also included. And yes, I busted out the sqiggly lines. That means it's serious.)

I would have freaked out and denied it if anyone said that to me normally, but I replied in a bit of a surprising way: "I noticed."

Later that night, I started feeling something I had never felt before. I had a huge knot in my stomach, my heart was beating incredibly fast, and he was the only thing on my mind. I had never been like this for anyone/thing else; I'm not sure, but I think it might be love.

If it isn't, somebody please explain to me why I'm wide awake at ~2:00 AM telling you about him. Please, I'd love to see an explanation.

If it is love, we maaaaay have a bit of a problem on our hands; he sent me a few pictures of himself (standing in front of a mirror wearing various suits. He likes suits. And, I've verified it's him due to a few drawings of his Lucario fursona on the same account to whatever website it is) and he looks to be around ~18-20 years old. Now, I'm not going to tell you my age, but let's just say if we started dating it miiiiight be considered pedophilia.

Now can I just fall asleep
Please

EDIT: Hnng I'm tired of refreshing the page to find nothing
Is my story stupid? It might be stupid.

I think you should evaluate your feelings a bit to see what you come up with, like, perhaps what kind of feelings you have for him and what specifically you like about him. Are you sure these are romantic feelings and not either a knee jerk crush that will pass or finding someone with a lot of similar interests and being really pop flyin' to grow your social circle? Got to kinda dig deep and ask yourself these things.

In addition, don't take being flattered by him to be evidence that you're gay. One of my gay friends in high school had a crush on a guy and buttered him up to the point where the guy was confused as to whether he was straight or not. He eventually determined he was straight, and set the record straight that while he appreciated the attention, he was not gay. So, in short, just because someone might have a crush on you (or at least seems to) doesn't mean you're attracted to them.

In addition, if you are attracted to him, weigh the options. You mentioned he's into suits, which you don't seem to be a fan of, and you're worried about the age factor. As far as suits go, that's up to you to decide if it's too much or whatever. But with age, the biggest thing would be to keep the relationship legal. If you're both consenting adults, age might be "weird" for some people, but a general non-issue. Keep in mind though, you don't seem to know his exact age, so he might be younger than expected, so eventually, it might be best to try confirming his age.

The only other thing is, give it time. You need to do some thinking, and jumping into this could be bad for both of you. You don't want to suddenly say "whoops I'm gay now because of you!~" and spook him into thinking you're some perv or something that lied to him, nor do you want to get in the relationship and find out these were temporary feelings and that you're actually straight.

As far as other things go, I'm sure you've talked to gay people before, but maybe not on the subject of homosexuality or as bluntly as this incident. Also, maybe the reason you felt complimented for being called gay comes from it being a term of acceptance rather than " man, you're gay". Plus, friends tend to get away with more shit than random "jackasses", so...

All I can say is to search your feelings for a bit, see if they waver or if they fixate on certain things.

For now, be friends. If you aren't attracted, you'll have him as a friend. If you are, maybe see where this road leads.

Well, like I said, I've been bi-curious for quite some time now, and this just (insert metaphor for "being restrained for a long time and suddenly being broken free").
Even though you pretty much ruined the magic of the moment, you gave some good advice; I'll wait it out a bit and see how it goes.

Thanks I guess.