AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Everytime I've had German Chocolate on a cake there's always been coconut as well.

I seriously cannot tell if you're kidding sometimes.

Vax wrote:Spoon I wanna get chocolate wasted

G I Joe said not to take chocolate from strangers

Clearly GI Joe didn't know the right kinda strangers

I don't even know where to put this post. I am so done. I'm done with everything. I'm so sick and tired of feeling isolated from my friends, being in a major that I hate with no way out, having a love life that never gets off the ground(heck, doesn't even have WINGS), being close to flat broke, and having no one to talk to about any of this, as I end up making the people I talk to about my life feel terrible that they can't help, or being physically unable to talk to people who could help and being completely scared of talking to my parents about my problems. I try to fix my problems, and EVERY SINGLE TIME, something out of my control stops me. I'm not even kidding. I have had it. I'm done.

On my favorite TF2 server I got attacked and mocked with rape jokes when I asked one person to not make them.

Nothing I could do would make them stop. I was ganged up on by 31 other people.

I'm crying really hard and shaking. I can't go to any server and feel safe. I thought I had finally found one and I was attacked.

I love TF2 and I really don't want to quit, but I don't know if I can take this anymore. I can't find a server to regularly play on and not be attacked.

The existence of any future nieces and nephews is in jeopardy because my eldest brother is an incontinent fucker when he's drunk.

kyle just left to take my mama cat to the vet

My eventual doom along with the entire universe's depresses me in the way only uncontrollable events can.

My anxiety just gets worse and worse every day

Whenever I realize I'm not as smart as I think I am, and that I might not accomplish much, I start to feel down. Constantly worrying that I might not get into college and stuff. I don't want to end up like the rest of my family and work minimum wage all my life.

-

no one wants to hang out anymore.

Since I'm 18 I should be able to do what I want, I think, because I'm legally an adult. But telling my parents that seems childish. It also wouldn't even work, because they're very hard headed. I hate how I can't go out cause my room's not clean, I haven't done laundry, or because my Dad thinks I should stay at home and clean up everything to help out my Mom. It feels very unfair, but I still think it's my fault? Like, my room's pretty messy I guess once my Mom yelled/pointed it out to me. She even checked under my bed. ;-; I shove things under there.. But bleh, it's clean enough for me, but it's their house so I guess it needs to be good enough for them. My mom also pointed out that I was out yesterday for most of the day at a convention anyway. But that doesn't feel fair too, because if they had it their way, I'd only be allowed out of the house to see friends one day out of the month. Though because the keep shutting me in it just makes me want to leave more. Mom's said more than once before that she liked me as a kid more because I was actually obedient. I now learned as well that if Mom's yelling at me and berating me, even if she repeats things too much because of lack of things to say, I'm not allowed to talk. Even if it's not talking back, she doesn't want to hear me say anything period.

So much teen angst ew. I hate feeling this way.

I just remembered that one of my really nice neighbors is from Oso where that huge-booty mile-wide landslide that collapsed half a mountain hit. bodaciously a fifth of the town is considered missing or dead right now, and something like 90 structures and a highway were taken out.
Rachel said that her parents lived in a different section of town, but one set of her grandparents and an aunt are currently missing (dead).
:c