AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Its kind of a weird feeling talking to someone I knew from a long time ago, seeing what they've grown up to be.

And whom I've grown up to be, its kinda weird being confirmed over the fact that I was treated like shit the worst at my old school.

I guess everyone can agree with the fact that I got the shit beaten out of me.

the new medication i'm taking for my arthritis isn't working and now i have to get my medication in injection form from now on and i have to do it myself apparently

Nyehh my older brother's punishing me for playing Leagues in the morning again, and for not helping my Mom with her computer. His points are: she's trying for her Masters, she's old now, and that I shouldn't even be playing Leagues in the morning. Though I can't really play any other time, because I'm always called to do something any time of the day. So he's taken Animal Crossing away, which he bought for me, gave me a condescending talking to, and to get it back I have to go tell Mom why I didn't wanna help her. I'm not the most responsible person ever, and I never understand what's their definition of messy so I don't jump up to go clean up everything. I'd rather clean up when I want to, because I know I'll do a more thorough job of it and do much more then. Though I guess it doesn't matter as long as I get stuff done.

Bleh, I hate being in debt to my family. I just wanna get a job and get out so I can stop bothering them. Though I wonder if I'm just making an excuse to go away to benefit myself.

My lady friend was out all last week on a school camping trip, and this week she hasn't got any free time because it's her last week of school. We only got to talk for about an hour on Sunday between all this, so I'm starting to miss her.

hi AZ i've been gone a while lost in various shit

recently had the realization that i need to cut all ties with my emotionally abusive family and find a way to pay for expensive-booty college on my unemployed, penniless own

i know it's basically necessary for my psychological stability at this point but god it's fucking terrifying and i'm just sad and freaked out at this point

i think when my dad threatened to kill my brother (disclaimer: he would not actually murder my brother) was sort of a turning point

i'm just so fucking sick of this family. and then i realized that the only part of my family i'd miss is my dog, and that made me more sad.

i don't even know if i've previously explained enough of my home situation on AZ for this post to make sense but i think i just needed to vent

It's cool to vent, Banter.

Being out on your own is gonna be hard, but it's going to be worth it for you. It sounds like distancing yourself from your family is of utmost importance right now, based on what you've posted here before. It's okay to not miss them - you can't choose your family, and if they treat you that badly you have no obligation to them. You can, however, choose the people you surround yourself with.

Definitely step one is to get out and find a job. Two, if you have to. Your education is super important, but remember you can always cut back, take a break, or even find a cheaper college to go to for a while until you get back on your feet.

Yeah, dude, you might want to put off college until you can actually pay for it, its near impossible to pay for tution on minimum wage

over 5 months later and I still get depressed and anxious about my ex-boyfriend

a+ great work

TheStranger wrote:Yeah, dude, you might want to put off college until you can actually pay for it, its near impossible to pay for tution on minimum wage

if you can find a community college to take your basics at you actually might be able to pay for it on min wage. my college classes were pretty cheap, maybe $100 per class? and you paid per semester according to the amount of classes you took (so one class was obv cheaper than 4) and you could take as many classes as you wanted at a time. it'd take a while, but you could knock out your basics by only doing a class or two a semester - however much you could afford. you might also be able to get a grant too, you'd have to ask financial aid. i had a pell grant for a year and the cheddar i had leftover actually paid for the next two years of college for me lol. they'd give me like...$2,000 for taking two classes so i'd have shit-tons left over o___O

if you have any scholarships or anything like that to a uni though you may lose them if you don't continue classes there...though all in all it might be worth it :/

I feel really bad about having to cancel my date with my lady friend this Friday. We've been trying to arrange it for months.
What's worse is that because she's away all week, she probably won't find out until the day it was supposed to happen.

I think you should keep the date. Tell your grandma that you thought she meant Saturday or Sunday, not Friday. Reschedule THAT instead.

Yeah, I will. Thanks. I just needed to hear it from someone else to make up my mind.

my mom says she might be depressed although i doubt that because she's pretty ignorant of mental health as a whole but when she said that my dad almost got worried and asked her if he could do anything and offered to take her for a walk and that. my dad never did anything like that for me. even now he just ignores my problems. i don't feel cared for.

I feel gross and fat about ninety percent of the time

But no quite gross and fat enough to do anything about it

The guy I like isn't in a talky mood
It makes me sad because I haven't talked to him in three days