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Re: Things that make you sad.
Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 1:19 pm
by AngelicSongx
Cynical Slob wrote:TheStranger wrote:Cynical Slob wrote:Man, I'm so bummed people always talk about whats going on with them in this thread and nobody responds
Sometimes you really dont know what to respond other than generic "sorry for your loss/pain/face cancer"
Yeah, I totally know what you mean. One of the worst experiences I've had IRL was when a friend's dad died, and I couldn't think of anything to say apart from "Gee I'm really sorry that happened." It was weird because I lost my dad from the same cause, but it was at a different period of my life and it's really hard, I've found, to not sound condescending or pretentious when you try and console someone
I kinda thought that I shouldn't expect people to respond what I've said. I mean most go here anyway to say what's upsetting them, so they can't really console anyone at the moment. I mean, I usually don't talk about my problems because I think they're super petty and not worth talking about, in comparison to everyone else's.
Like this one: I keep crossing my fingers and thinking in my head when I meet a guy "please don't like me, please don't fall for me, please don't use me as a crutch for happiness, please don't stop being my friend when you learn about Tuxedo Mask". It's happened too many times. I'm want to start wearing a sack over my head.
Re: Things that make you sad.
Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 1:42 pm
by Cynical Slob
That's not a very good thought attitude. If anything it'll lead to a great loop where you start expecting worse and worse things because you keep revolving around negative thoughts
Re: Things that make you sad.
Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 1:53 pm
by AngelicSongx
I'm not sure how to not think like that. Especially since someone subtly pointed out to me that I complain a bit too much. Plus wouldn't it sometimes be considered a good thing, or that you're strong as a person to not complain about stuff a lot? (Not to disregard anyone form posting in this thread if you want to, I just think that of myself.)
Re: Things that make you sad.
Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 2:11 pm
by Cynical Slob
Nah, I see where you're coming from, and I swear I had a more refuting point in my head before I started typing this, but it starts to spiral to a point where you're anxiously second guessing yourself like, all the time
Re: Things that make you sad.
Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 2:41 pm
by Dire
Complaining can be healthy. Means you don't accept what's wrong with what's going on around you.
The sooner other people know that friendship isn't a one way ticket to your 'forbidden V' the better.
Re: Things that make you sad.
Posted: Tue Jul 02, 2013 12:07 am
by Kergan
Yay, things are just getting worse and worse, now I've been rejected for my summer job, so I'm gonna have to spend the summer with my parents, listening to them criticizing my choices.
Yaaaaaaay.
Re: Things that make you sad.
Posted: Tue Jul 02, 2013 4:29 am
by Chopstix
I'd say keep applying to get a job, 30~40 hours a week out of the house will probably help your summer a lot. Nothing should be below you and take what you can get! Also maybe volunteering would get you out of the house more!
Okay, so about a week and a half ago I told my dad I was gay via facebook because it was the only way I could physically do it. He saw the message the same day but hasn't said anything to me or even tried to get into contact with me. I didn't even want to tell him because I've almost lost my father before and I didn't want to lose him again. I'm so mad at him for not saying anything but I also can't help but beat myself up over everything. Maybe mom and dad wouldn't have gotten a divorce if i was different, maybe things would be easier if i was straight and other shit like that.
For the longest time I hated myself for being gay and never told anybody. And I was finally able to stop thinking that way and finally build up some courage to tell him but then this happens. And honestly the thoughts of hating myself are coming back to me quickly.
Re: Things that make you sad.
Posted: Tue Jul 02, 2013 7:35 am
by Kamak
You should never hate yourself for being true to who you are, not should you blame yourself for any bad blood your parents had.
I hope everything works out, but if it doesn't just know that there's support for you. It'll be hard but you can get past this.
Re: Things that make you sad.
Posted: Tue Jul 02, 2013 7:50 am
by Chopstix
Thank you for the kind words man, it really does mean a lot.
I remember when I was 6 my dad was hospitalized (it was either for drugs or his depression) and he made me this keychain and told me that I might have to be the man of the house. I didn't know what that meant at the time but it always made me scared of losing him. He's done some really shitty things to me and my family and to himself but I love him and I'll never stop loving him so it's hard to imagine a life without him, you know?
Re: Things that make you sad.
Posted: Tue Jul 02, 2013 3:19 pm
by Nancymaker
Man Chopstix, you've been a bit of a gay idol for me ever since I joined the forum! You've always been comfortable and sure of yourself when you've posted here and I've also tried to maintain a confidant gay persona in online communities, in some part due to you. Your sexuality is never something you should feel any level of shame over.
My Dad's always been quite hard to talk to, but I remember when I told him I was gay, about a month after I'd realised. I don't think he was too surprised (I hadn't had a girlfriend in years so obviously SOMETHING was wrong, or something like that), but he was still really awkward and anxious. We never really talked about it again after that, and while my step mum was pretty comfortable making casual remarks about my sexuality, he stayed cleer of that. It didn't make me feel sad though, it just made me feel frustrated. I've confronted him a few more times since then and asked him how he REALLY feels (to which he has said he loves me regardless), and told him that I'd LIKE for him to talk to me about it and ask me things and even slag me off a bit if he likes.
Granted in this situation 'Don't get sad, get mad' might not be terribly appropriate. But if the people you love and care about, and who are supposed to love and care about you end up making you uncomfortable because you are being brave and honest and true to yourself, then that is very much so their problem, not yours, and it is them that should feel bad.
Re: Things that make you sad.
Posted: Wed Jul 03, 2013 2:57 am
by Chopstix
naaaancy stooooop, you legit made me tear up and that's just stunning to me that you think of me that way! You have no idea what that means to me and I can't thank you enough for the kind words. It's hard to wanna be mad at him because I've always remembered that for every bad things he's done he's done 5 more good things. I remember him telling me that when I was a baby and if I would wake up crying in the middle of the night, he'd take me outside and he would turn on the TV out on our porch (TEXAS) and the dog races would be on and he'd tell me made up stories about all the dogs until I would fall asleep.
I was in a bad place yesterday but it's past thanks to you guys and boyfriend lovin'. Though, I have to admit I never thought i made an impact with anyone here so i took you all for granted but I was so wrong, thank you all so much for the nice things you've said to me and I hope i can return the kindness with as much unconditional love as i can!
Re: Things that make you sad.
Posted: Wed Jul 03, 2013 7:15 am
by Barabba
I don't know if I can get my giant monster into Colossal Kaiju Combat. People say it has a cool design, but I don't think it's cool enough to the point where people will spend $10 to sponsor it to be in a raffle for in-game status. Hell, I'm not sure if I'd spend cheddar on it.
Re: Things that make you sad.
Posted: Wed Jul 03, 2013 7:33 pm
by Nachalnik
i miss my old boyfriend a lot and i think about him everyday
i'm so fucked up
Re: Things that make you sad.
Posted: Fri Jul 05, 2013 7:18 pm
by creakyAccordion
I really feel like I lost a few friends, including my best friend
Re: Things that make you sad.
Posted: Fri Jul 05, 2013 9:09 pm
by SaintCrazy
I just read a story about a girl who was sexually abused and now I'm really sad. Every now and then I remember it and get sad again, too.