AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Transform the empty space thing into your hideout. Put up your favourite poster of you doing a back flip

Deiphobus wrote:shoot the stain

My thoughts exactly.

Try to lure anything out of it's potential hiding place.

Announce "So we meet again on the field of battle"

Of course, it could just be your friend, Grotaski. You were supposed to go to that space aquarium, remember? Oh shit! He's probably already there, wondering where you are!

Never stand up your bros! That's your motto.

Inspect stain. (not creative at all)

Because you have no imagination or something along those lines, you decide to take a close look at the reddish stain. Clearly, it will give you a clue as to just what horrors had happened previously in this place, and will add a level of creepiness to the atmosphere-

Oh, wait, it's just rust. How slightly disappointing. You wonder how something managed to get rusty in space, though. Your no expert on rust (or anything except mottos, really), but your pretty sure there needs to be water for something to be rusty.

shoot the stain

Now, you would totally do this, but the only guns you have are your big ol' muscular arms. And they don't fire bullets. Anymore, anyway.

Find things that rhyme with stain.

You take a moment to ponder the many things that rhyme with stain.

Like pain, and gain, and lane, and sane, and mane, and cane, and Jane, and zane...y.

That's all you can think of right now.

Transform the empty space thing into your hideout. Put up your favourite poster of you doing a back flip

You figure that a place this empty and deserted will make a great hideout. You don't have any posters of you doing back flip, though. You had to burn them all after the... well, you don't like to think about that particular incident.

Try to lure anything out of it's potential hiding place.

Announce "So we meet again on the field of battle"

Of course, it could just be your friend, Grotaski. You were supposed to go to that space aquarium, remember? Oh shit! He's probably already there, wondering where you are!

You haven't seen Grotaski in years. After the war started, contact with him became pretty much impossible. You had some good times though. Your not sure you would ever go to an aquarium, though, unless it was to punch the fish. Or, more specifically, for you to punch the fish. Grotaski would probably be punch by the fish. He was always sort of a wimp.

Anyway, these old abandoned places are always less abandoned than they seem. You call out to try and lure anything that may be hiding out. You hear a very old sounding voice coming from behind the door.

"Waddya talkin' about? I've never seen you wippersnapper before in my li- er, I mean, I'm the wind! Creeaaaaak! Creeeeaeaa- *Cough*"

shoot the wind

You think that horse over there might have 'the dead'.

Go beat it.

After that, back away from the man, and ask him who he is.

Deiphobus wrote:shoot the wind

I believe you mean, shoot the breeze.

Befriend the space hobo

"Ah, more enemies to fight. More walking sacrifices to my guns. PUNCH THEM. MUST PUNCH THEM"

Punch where you think the voice might be coming from. You don't want no bum in your secret hideout. Unless they're your servants.

shoot the wind

You can't. You have no gun.

Also there's no wind in space.

After that, back away from the man, and ask him who he is.

You back away from the door that the voice is behind and ask who he is. He doesn't here you though. He's behind the door.

"Ah, more enemies to fight. More walking sacrifices to my guns. PUNCH THEM. MUST PUNCH THEM"

Punch where you think the voice might be coming from. You don't want no bum in your secret hideout. Unless they're your servants.

You immediately punch the where the voice is coming from. Which is behind the reinforced, metal door.

You hurt your hand quite a bit.

Befriend the space hobo

You decide to open the door and see if you can befriend this space old guy. You open the door. Inside is a small room. There are newspaper clippings and photos all over the wall, with read marker connecting some and crossing out others. Some notes are also scribbled on the wall.

You see the old man crouched in the corner, with his face facing the ground. He honestly seems to think you can't see him. He ignores you whenever you try to say something to him.

Be a good sport and make him a cup of tea.

Take a dump on his head

That's your motto

Pretend he isn't there, and shout to no-one in specific-
"To bad this room is empty. I needed a space-sidekick to help me on my space-adventure. What a space-shame I'll have no-one to share the space-glory with. Also space-teasure. In space."

Be a good sport and make him a cup of tea.

You don't have the tools necessary to make a nice hot cup of tea. However, you always keep a bottle of ice tea on you at all times. You offer him the bottle. He still pretends you are not there, so you dump the iced tea on him. He flinches and groans, but still ignores you and stays where he is.

Take a dump on his head

That's your motto

No. No it isn't, actually. Your motto is "Can't go if you don't have too". Which is exactly why you can't poop on the old guy.

Pretend he isn't there, and shout to no-one in specific-
"To bad this room is empty. I needed a space-sidekick to help me on my space-adventure. What a space-shame I'll have no-one to share the space-glory with. Also space-teasure. In space."

You talk out loud about all the space-related things you are going to be doing and how you really need a sidekick. Because you want this old guy as your sidekick, apparently. You also shove the word "space" in there like every other word for some reason. He STILL doesn't respond. What a space-tastrophe.

and then if he doesn't listen to you punch his face. Ignoring people is rude. that's your motto.

No it isn't. You ignore people all the time. However, "always punch people who piss you off" IS your motto, and you feel that it's very relevant right now. You punch the old guy in the face as hard as you can. He STILL manages to ignore you. Or you knocked him out cold. One of those two.

By the looks of it, you aren't going to be able to get a reaction out of this guy. You should probably try concentrating on other things.

Inspect the wall of pictures.

Draw extra lines randomly because you are a prankster like that.