AWKWARD ZOMBIE

[7:42:19 PM] Malum: I want to go back in
[7:42:20 PM] Malum: time
[7:42:26 PM] Malum: And have sex with Nikola Tesla
[7:42:35 PM] Malum: wait shit
[7:42:35 PM] Malum: fuck
[7:42:39 PM] Malum: he's asexual
[7:42:48 PM] Malum: CURSE YOU SEXY NIKOLA TESLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Tales wrote:just pretend i'm wearing pants ok

[3:27:04 PM] Panties: but yea my computer would probably commit herrycarry if i tried something like that
[3:27:13 PM] The Big Cheese: the fuck is herrycarry
[3:27:20 PM] The Big Cheese: the baseball commentator?
[3:27:22 PM] Yeili: what
[3:27:24 PM] Yeili: do you perhaps mean
[3:27:25 PM] Yeili: heresy
[3:27:32 PM] The Big Cheese: HEY
[3:27:33 PM] The Big Cheese: DOCTOR
[3:27:40 PM] The Big Cheese: WOULD YOU EAT THE MOON IF IT WERE MADE OF RIBS
[3:27:42 PM] Panties: no the thing where jap soldiers stabbed themselves
[3:27:46 PM] Panties: thats harrycarry isnt it
[3:27:48 PM] Yeili: that's seppuku
[3:27:53 PM] Panties: ...
[3:27:54 PM] Cafall: sudoku
[3:28:04 PM] Panties: isnt the plane bombing harrycarry then?
[3:28:07 PM] The Big Cheese: YOU MEAN HARI KARI?
[3:28:09 PM] Panties: yea
[3:28:11 PM] The Big Cheese: HAHA OH WOW

[3:53:44 PM] Cafall: Great Handsome Oppressor was many times more gay than my dick
[3:54:00 PM] Le Great Handsome Oppressor: Thank you

6:35 AM - The Willow Witch: your butt is fine
6:35 AM - The Willow Witch: ripe for spanking

Yeili: (in call) You can shut up and you can stay shut up!

Argumentable: you're an idiot
bbb: u jbiw

[10:45:21 PM] Decker: there's actually this website where you can ＡＢＡＮＤＯＮ　ＹＯＵＲ　ＭＯＲＴＡＬ　ＳＨＥＬＬ　ＡＮＤ　ＴＡＫＥ　ＨＯＬＤ　ＴＨＥ　ＵＮＤＹＩＮＧ　ＢＵＲＤＥＮ　ＯＦ　ＴＨＥ　ＤＡＲＫ　ＬＯＲＤ　ＨＩＭＳＥＬＦ

(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: But yeah let me tell you about my idea for a blowjob economy
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: So there would have to be a system
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: Someone who gave better blowjobs would get more per blowjob than someone who didn't
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: So there would be a voting system, to rate the blowjobs
Malum: That's retarded
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: You obviously can't give someone's blowjobs to someone else, so that would be a problem
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: It'd basically just be trading
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: A one time trading thing
Malum: Yeah well
Malum: Not everyone has a dick
Malum: FATAL FLAW TWO
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: There would ALSO be a system for cunnlingus
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: So HA
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: That'll be three blowbucks
Malum: Also what about underage people
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: They don't get cheddar
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: Duh
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: Gosh Malum, you're so dumb sometimes
Malum: No u
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: Now I'm charging you five blowbucks
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: What's your blowrating
Malum is now Away.
Malum is now Online.
Malum: What for
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: For being dumb
Malum: I didnt buy anything
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: You bought my time and annoyance
Malum: BEING DUMB ISN'T A CRIME
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: IN THE BLOWJOB SOCIETY IT IS.
Malum: This is the worst idea ever
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: It'll make people stop being dumb
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: If they have to give a blowjob every time they are dumb
Malum: WHAT IF I OWNED A BLOWJOB MACHINE?
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: Then we will take it away from you, that is illegal contraband
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: Putting good honest whores out of work
Malum: I'm going to destroy this society
Malum: With asexuality
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: There's no sexuality involved
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: Just blowjobs for currency
Malum: Then bjs have no value
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: They do
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: Because the state says so
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: The State of the Sexy Party Emperor
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: I mean, it's no different than slips of paper having value
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: I mean, do you really want that slip of paper?
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: Is it a wonderful thing?
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: Is it a valuable resource?
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: No it is not.
Malum: Paper is backed by gold isn't it?
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: The blowjobs will be backed by handjobs
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: Which will be backed by gold
Malum: THIS IS THE WORST IDEA
Malum stabs you
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: SHUT UP YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS YOU DIDN'T THINK OF IT FIRST
Malum: NO I'm the opposite of jealous
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: Man, you aren't just jelly
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: You're fucking
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: Preserves
(H-C) Friendly Sandvich Heavy: No, you're the whole fucking fruit

Avengifier: That's right, I'm your daddy.
Avengifier: *eyebrow waggle*
Chumpersonable: oh my god
Chumpersonable: ~~~~
Chumpersonable: ooh mister vengie oooh

[8:58:47 PM] Tucker Trilby: hey booty answer your phone for a change
[8:58:59 PM] MC: im on the toilet
[8:59:07 PM] MC: its inappropriate
[8:59:15 PM] Tucker Trilby: mother fucker you always are on the toilet
[8:59:25 PM] MC: everybody poops